Most wives enjoy their husbands touching them with deep embraces and gentle caresses, but what about something more titillating? How can a husband use his hands to stir up his wife’s desire and give her oodles of pleasure?
Manual play refers to your hubby using his hands on your genitalia to arouse and satisfy you sexually. There’s quite a bit he can do down there with his talented, God-given hands. Let’s talk about a few approaches. (I do get pretty detailed, by the way.) If something here intrigues you, invite your husband to give it a try.
Rub-a-dub-dub. Hubby can use his fingers or whole hand to simply rub your privates. This might feel best away from the most sensitive areas, like the clitoris, instead focusing on either side of your vulva or the “mound,” or mons pubis, above the genitals. The right pressure is important, and he should probably approach it like a massage stroke.
Tease and please. Speaking of pressure, his fingers can be used with soft strokes to tease and please all of the areas of your pleasure places. One tip most men need is to go slow. Sometimes a husband can get antsy wanting to rev things up quickly and get you to that powerful peak. However, women usually respond better by warming up slowly and enjoying all the lovely sensations along the way. Let him know this is a tease-fest, and you want him to stay with it until you beg for more.
Round and round he goes. I’m talking circles. Why am I giving circles its own section? Because it’s very easy to explain to hubby and can feel very good to wifey. Where can he circle his hand or fingers? How about around your vulva? The perimeter of your vaginal opening? Your clitoris? All of those places would likely respond to circular motion with his hands.
Slip-’n-slide. Let him come inside. Have hubby slip his finger into your vagina, called “digital penetration.” Usually, the finger that works best is the middle one, because of its flexibility and the rest of the hand stabilizing it. Using that finger also allows him to have other fingers free to stroke or rub the area outside as well. If you’d like, he can add another finger or two, increasing the friction and sense of fullness. He can simply caress your vagina, thrust in and out to mimic intercourse, or hook his finger toward the front and try to locate your G-spot. If he can find it (no guarantee, but worth a shot), your pleasure will likely build even more with direct contact to that sensitive site.
What’s the goal of manual play? Primarily, it’s foreplay. It should be a huge turn-on to you and to him for you to be touched. In this way, your husband can explore your tender places and get to know your body more fully. Meanwhile, you can experience the pleasurable sensations of being lovingly touched in your most private area.
Manual play is also a fabulous way to get your lubrication going. In order to have intercourse, you need to be “wet.” If he can stimulate you first with his hands, then he can reach in a bit, draw out your natural lubrication, and spread it over your vulva. Don’t worry if you’re not producing much on your own, though. You can always grab some personal lubricant and use it during manual play, or introduce it before intercourse. Your manual play might actually feel better with some added wetness to get things moving.
Note that manual play is a great method of reaching climax. Many wives respond well to their husband’s hands stimulating them down below. Quite frankly, a hand can be more precise and adaptive than a penis. Thus, if you need a certain level of pressure or for him to hit that right spot, having him “finger” you might be the best way to nudge you up that climax cliff and send you over the edge. This position can also be very enjoyable for a husband, because he gets to watch the entire thing. Most hubbies love seeing their wives experience that wave of excitement, and knowing he did it all with his hand is a pretty awesome attaboy he can give himself.
A few last-minute tips for manual play, to make sure things go smoothly.
Give him access. For years, I didn’t think our girly parts were all that pretty, so I wasn’t super-willing to show them off to the hubby. He doesn’t see it that way. Regardless of how we feel about ourselves down there, we need to embrace our husband’s fascination with our goodies. Hubby likely thinks it’s an amusement park down there, and he’s itching to pay his ticket and see the sights. So let him. Share your feminine beauty by breathing easily, opening up, and letting him see and touch this special part of your God-woven body.
Use lubricant. Your own natural juices or purchased personal lubricant or coconut oil will help your husband’s hands glide across your private places and the contact will feel much better to you. After a bit of stimulation, you can invite your husband to swirl his finger into your opening and draw out the wetness there to share with the rest of your area.
Go slow. Make sure he knows this isn’t a race. You want to enjoy his hands and fingers fondling you, so ask him to give you time to bask in his talents and your sensations. Your arousal will be heightened if he can start slow and build the speed, pressure, and intensity as your body responds to his touch.
Remember the clitoris. The clitoris is a particularly sensitive area of your privates. It’s a knobby bit of flesh at the top of your vagina that swells when highly aroused. Climaxes occur when the clitoris is directly or indirectly stimulated, and manual play can take real advantage of that. Your husband can see directly when he’s hitting that spot and lean into that pleasure for you. Show him exactly where you want to be touched, pointing out the location of your clitoris and the type of strokes that feel best.
Manual play can be an excited part of your lovemaking. Add it to your foreplay, use it to explore and experience orgasm, and let your husband be hands-on with his wife. Pay attention to the beautiful sensations that emerge, and thank God for the fabulous skill of hands.