Hot, Holy & Humorous

5 Fresh Christmas Gift Ideas for Your Husband

A couple of weeks ago, I gave you a roundup of all of my previous gift ideas, which you can find here: A Sleigh-ful of Gift Ideas for Your Spouse. But what else have I got? Any other ideas?

As a matter of fact, I was feeling a bit tapped out last month, which prompted me to post this on Facebook:

I do a Christmas gift post every year, and I'm wondering what to do this year. I mean, really, how many sex-related gifts can I come up with us spouses to give one another? I'm just wondering how to shake things up this year. Is there a different angle you'd like to see? Any fresh thoughts on how I can address the gift-giving thing this holiday season?

And y’all gave me some great ideas! I’m going to cover them in categories (including a couple more I came up with myself).

Red background, green wrapped present, title of post

1. Romantic Messages for Your Bedroom. Deuteronomy encourages us to write God’s commandments “on the doorframes of your houses and on your gates” (6:9). Because displaying important messages in front of our eyes on a daily basis practically guarantees we’ll remember their content and their importance.

Wouldn’t that also be true of your marriage? A few months ago, I finally put up wall art in our bedroom that looks like this:

"I have found the one whom my soul loves." Song of Solomon 3:4

I can’t tell you how many times I’ve read that message, and how often it makes me smile. It reminds me that I believe that and to believe that. How about a bedroom decor gift that celebrates your marital love or intimacy?

Gifts.com has a number of wall art options that can be personalized for a couple. Here are two of my favorites (click on the picture to find the item):

And Etsy.com features many shops that make beautiful wall art, including Song of Solomon themed options like these:

I have found the one whom my soul loves, I have found the one my soul loves, Song of Solomon Wall Decal, Song of Solomon Wall Art

EADY TO SHIP,My Beloved Is Mine And I am His,Song Of Solomon 2:16, Scripture Art,Scripture Wall Art,Wood Sign,Wedding Gift, Weddings

2. Date Nights for the Year. Just type that into the Pinterest search bar, and I bet you can find a gazillion ideas. But here’s how Hannah said it on my Facebook page:

I made a date jar for this Christmas. Hubby doesn’t like planning dates because, I’ll be honest, I can be moody and wishy washy. So I made him a date jar with different colored popsicle sticks. Each color represents how expensive that type of date would be so if we are broke he can still pick a date and “plan” it. Takes the stress off of him and gives me what I want, a date I didn’t have to plan. 

What a great idea, Hannah!

To help you get started, Oh Simple Joys provides a good list with DIY Date Night Jar (52 Almost Free Ideas), Freshly Married has an impressive master list of date night ideas, and The Dating Divas has a Steamy Bucket List you could make as a gift.

3. An Outside-the-Box Activity. I recently listened to an interview of clinical psychologist and marriage author Dr. Les Parrott on The Art of Manliness podcast, and he mentioned an amazing finding. Remember those fluttery feelings when you were first falling in love? Some of that is fueled by the novelty of getting to know your now-spouse, and after a while, that part of the romance seems to fade. Yet you can tap into that by doing novel activities as a couple. You get that same rush of excitement and it’s paired with your beloved when you do something fresh together, whether it’s exploring a new garden or skydiving from a plane.

So how about a gift that isn’t tangible but rather an experience? (Thanks to Ambrosia for this idea.) Book that weekend trip or last-minute cruise deal, buy those tickets to a game or concert, make reservations for a couples cooking class or horseback riding, schedule a tour of your local museum or winery, plan a state park visit or beach outing.

There are many creative ways to put your Date Night in a Box together. But just make sure your idea is something outside-the-box that will bring an opportunity to share new memories, engage in fresh conversation, and foster your friendship and romance.

4. A Celebration of His Manhood. Your man is different from you. Manlier. Of course. Sometimes we overlook the importance of celebrating our guy’s masculinity — his particular interests, hobbies, delights. What if your gift instead celebrated his manhood?

Here’s what Debbie said on my Facebook page:

What about gifts speaking to manly or womanly hearts? Just thinking out loud….I think by far my husbands favorite gift was the braveheart sword I got him one year…

Can you get more manly than a replica of William Wallace’s sword?

William Wallace Sword braveheart 51"

Or maybe an Indiana Jones whip.*

Now I don’t actually know what says to your particular husband, I celebrate the man you are, but I bet you could come up with some ideas. It could be a T-shirt with his favorite fantasy character or movie quote. It could be a crossbow and arrows with a gift certificate to an archery range. It could be tickets to an ice hockey game or a men’s worship conference. It could be the newest gadget that seems like a complete waste of time to you but that catches his eye every time you enter Best Buy.

And yes, I know those ideas sound somewhat stereotypical. It’s still true for a lot of husbands, but maybe your hubby’s masculinity comes out in his cooking and he’d appreciate a chef’s hat and new utensils. Or maybe your husband’s a history buff, and a subscription to WWII History magazine would bring him great joy.

You know your husband and what he likes. Give him something he wouldn’t expect you to buy for him, but that celebrates and shows your appreciation for his manhood.

5. A Sex Schedule. So this is for the wives whose husbands want sex fairly often. (I’ll address how higher-drive wives can use this information in a minute.) What if your Christmas gift to your higher-drive spouse was a 2017 calendar on which you’d marked days you committed to have sex?

Maybe your idea is to choose one day of the week and make that your guaranteed, I’m-a-sure-thing promise. So you’d simply take a calendar, decorate every Thursday (or whatever) with markers, stickers, glitter, etc. and encourage him to hang it somewhere he can see it the next year.

Or maybe you want to promise banner sex once a month, one time that will be more special in some way than the other times. You could select your weekend each month and then theme it, like:

January – Exploring Positions
February – New Location
March – Strip Tease Foreplay

…and so on. You can choose what you want to include, increase his (and your) anticipation, and share the commitment to try some new things for your marriage bed this next year. I suspect this gift would make most husbands smile.

Now to the higher-drive wives … can you use an idea like this? You can, but you’d likely have to change its focus. For lower-drive spouses, this could feel like a demand, and it’s better to issue invitations and flirtations. You might gift him a calendar with a note suggesting you together fill in the dates you’ve had sex throughout the year with the idea of celebrating your sexual intimacy. Sometimes tracking it will help you both see sex as a priority and help you know what’s really happening. You could give him the calendar and ask him to mark up when he would like to have sex. But remember, you don’t want this gift to become a point of contention. So if you think conflict is likely to arise, maybe skip this idea and focus on some of the other ones above that foster your relationship … which will hopefully lead to more sex.

That’s it! Five fresh Christmas gift ideas for your husband.

And what have I bought for my husband? Zilch, zero, nada. (And he’s probably reading this, so I need to get busy shopping.) Let’s come up with something great for our hubbies this Christmas!

29 thoughts on “5 Fresh Christmas Gift Ideas for Your Husband”

  1. J wrote:
    Can you get more manly than a replica of William Wallace’s sword?

    Or maybe an Indiana Jones whip?

    Eric Sez: OUCH!! I don’t need either weapon. She doesn’t like spanking; certainly not whipping. And the sword?? (OTOH, some wives do like to be spanked, and find that a couple of whacks with hubs’s hand on the bare bottom gets them in the mood for something a bit more tender. To each his own, I guess).

    Actually, since December 7, 2016 is the 75th anniversary of the Japanese attack on Pearl Harbor, Hawaii, there are several new titles currently available about the war with Japan and the battles in the South Pacific. My sweet wife is getting me one of these for Christmas!
    Eric

    1. OH MY GOODNESS! NOOOOO! These are gifts to celebrate his manhood, not anything BDSM in the bedroom. I never went there. Don’t intend anyone to go there. It’s for him to hang up on a wall and feel good about.

        1. Sometimes tone does not come across in written comments. But yes, I panicked, because I didn’t want anyone to get the wrong idea! Lol.

  2. One year I gave my hubby a date-night box, full of 12 envelopes with a planned out date in each of them. Each month, we’d reserve a night/day on our calendar and then that morning, he’d open the envelope to see where we were going or what we were doing. Some dates kept us at home (spa night or grilled steak nights), some tooks us to our favorite or familiar places (recreation of first date) and some were new adventures for us both (bike riding at a local nature preserve). We both LOVED it and it really helped us both see the importance of dating one another! I HIGHLY recommend this gift!!

    And btw, we have Song of Solomon 6:3 on our wall above our bed 😉

    1. Jenn S. wrote: “Some dates kept us at home (spa night or grilled steak nights), ”

      This is for the wives, from a husband with more than 50 years experience: Men, more than women, often prefer to have their fun at home than a night on the town. My wife and I do go out a lot, but my favorite restaurant trip is always for breakfast–which might not work for some guys–my schedule, OTOH, is flexible. After six in the evening I’m thinking of a home-cooked meal and bed.

      If HE wishes to gift you with an evening dinner and a show or dancing, great. But if you’re doing this to please him, be sure it’s what he really wants. A lot of guys will go along with DW’s plans, even though they may prefer to be home. So why not send the kids to Grandma’s? Something else that works is a meal on the town, then the night in a hotel, so he doesn’t have to drive home tired. Wife and I occasionally put up at a bed & breakfast near where we live. We rent a room with a hot tub, watch a few movies, then do “what comes naturally.” We can then sleep late, and breakfast is right downstairs. We both enjoy this very much.
      Eric

      1. I think this might have more to do with personality type than gender. I am a classic introvert and much prefer staying home over going out for date night. My hubby is an extrovert and thrives off things like going out.

        1. ANW wrote: “I think this might have more to do with personality type than gender.”

          You’re probably right, ANW. But the principle still applies. Often we think that the other spouse wishes to do what we want to do, but he/she may be too polite to tell the truth. My wife is a party animal, and going out for an evening is her way of relaxing after a tiring day. I don’t have that figured out yet, but I accept that it’s true. Me? When the sun goes down I wanna go home!

          Eric

    2. Jenn S, this is a FANTASTIC idea. I think I might give this to my husband for Christmas. You may have just inadvertently solved one of my biggest issues.
      I do believe my husband wants to date me. However, he stinks at coming up with ideas. He always wants to do “whatever you want to do.” This makes me crazy. I have told him I think he always tries to push the decision making off on me just to torture me. I am honestly SO afraid of making the wrong choice. I also have a huge issue about asking for gifts. It feels like begging. I was brought up never to ask for a gift. One day, I asked my grandmother if I could have a sleepover at her house. She said yes and she seemed happy about it, but I got in HUGE trouble by my father for being so rude and inviting myself. I think I was about 8 at the time. I meant no harm, but – lesson learned!

      Anyhow, on to the good stuff. I won’t beg to be taken out on a date. There’s a part of me that feels asking is rude, and saying what I want is selfish. Another part of me feels like if he actually wanted to spend time with me, he’d come up with an idea on his own. The trouble is, I’m actually full of good ideas, but I won’t share them because of all my issues. Once I saw a billboard and said, “I’ve always wished I could go there” and he was like “What? Why didn’t you say something? I would’ve taken you there.” But in my heart I don’t feel like I deserve to ask. Who am I? Queen of the world?

      So ANYWAY, when I read your comment, it was like a lightbulb went off. If I can get over myself long enough to create the date box, then he’s got a year’s worth of ideas, and he’ll not have to worry about if it’s something I’d be interested in, because I gave him the ideas. And having a date box all set up will remind us we need to spend time together and I won’t feel like I have to beg, “hey can you spend some time with me OTHER than watching someone fix a car on TV?” ?

      So I guess what I’m saying is, there’s a part of me that thinks he actually does like to see me happy, but I’m so worried about being selfish or greedy that I refuse to say what I feel or what I like. I think this might quite possibly be an answer to prayer, and a great gift for both of us. (I homeschool, so I don’t contribute to the family financially. So I feel even MORE guilty that he has to pay for everything and I’m just a leech – although he gets upset if I say that, so I try to just be grateful.) But I actually think if my happiness makes him feel happier, and I take the pressure off him of having to come up with a good idea, that would be a more meaningful gift to him than anything money could buy.

      So thank you, J, for this post, and thank you Jenn S for the idea. I think it just might work.

      1. B, this is a big step forward for you. Brava! He really does love you, I can tell, and I think you’re accepting it.

        Neither of us is big on going out on the town on a fancy date. But the main point is that we are spending our time with each other, whatever we may or may not be doing.?

        BTW, we also homeschooled. I worked two jobs to make it possible, but the money I earned was”ours,” not “mine.” You are no leech, and the way you contribute to the family is HUGE!

        Love your husband, accept his love for you, and let the gift giving begin!

      2. You are not a leech. Just add up what the costs are for a maid, personal shopper, cook, nanny, etc. and you will clearly see that your husband couldn’t afford you! And it sounds like you grew up with the same ridiculous demands I did.

      3. B,
        Just wanted to comment, too, on some of what you wrote.
        1. Bravo in taking steps towards healing in your marriage. Maybe they are baby steps, but progress forward is progress forward – yay you!
        2. Maybe it is because we homeschool, too, but I’ve thought a lot about you considering yourself a leech. My intent is not to discourage you, and maybe it is discouraging to you having people on here contradict a lot of what you say. However, I hope you can see that there was a lot of wrong teaching happening while you were growing up, and it was harmful. Harmful for you as a woman, a Christian and as a wife. In seeing that, hopefully you can, at least sometimes, start/continue distinguishing between right and wrong when thoughts come into your head. I hope you’ll see that what I am trying to accomplish, and I’m sure many others on here as well, is not to hurt you, but encourage you to a better and more biblical way of thinking.
        I went through 3 years of college and got a degree. I worked in my field for 1.5 years before our first baby was born. When baby was born, I quit work outside the home completely. I received a lot of flak from other Christians saying i shouldn’t “throw away” my degree like that – that it was a waste! My husband and I don’t see it like that. We consider my staying home full time as an investment. An investment in the lives of our family and children. I know not everyone else sees this the same way, and some can’t have it this way – there are moms who want to or have to work outside the home. Staying home full time is a challenge, but also a blessing. Like Angie said, your time at home is incredibly valuable. Not only the physical things you do like teaching, cooking, shopping, but also emotionally supporting your husband and children.
        All that to say, You.Are.Not.A.Leech, B. If this is what you and husband have chosen to do, and believe this is God’s plan for your home, do you think that that is what He considers you? Please try to see yourself the way He sees you.
        Continuing to pray for you!

  3. Thanks everyone, for your kind words about my staying home to homeschool. I do feel very guilty for not producing an income. Most of the homeschooling moms I know work (at an income producing job) – at least part time.
    I know I’m blessed to have a husband who enjoys working and makes a decent living that provides us these opportunities. But I just can’t help but wonder if he doesn’t ever feel annoyed that I don’t help bring in money. He doesn’t seem to mind, but I still feel awful knowing when someone asks him “what does your wife do?” All he can say is “nothing.” But he says he doesn’t say that, he tells them “she’s a teacher and she homeschools our children.” I do teach our children, of course, and I teach theatre to teenagers, but I don’t think that qualifies me to claim I’m a “teacher”. It would be more honest of him to just answer “nothing”.

    Anyhow, enough of that! I really meant to just say thank you for your kind replies.

    And the good news….. I’m working on creating that date box for my husband’s Christmas gift! I’m having fun with it. It’s hard coming up with 12 ideas, and I still feel like a bit of a freeloader asking to be taken on these dates (again – I can’t help pay for them). BUT, there’s a part of me that knows he will be very happy with the box of ideas that he knows I’ll enjoy, and maybe even the fact that I’m trying to relax and allowing him to take me somewhere I’d like to go without acting like I don’t deserve it. Oh it’s hard to even type those words – I feel so selfish! But I know my husband wants to just take me out and have fun together, so I’m gonna try to finish filling this box. ?

    1. B, my wife hasn’t had an income-producing job since the third year of our marriage, when I stopped being a student and had a full-time job myself. And when we decided to homeschool, the brunt of that fell on her. Yes, we missed out on some “things” that others had because of their dual incomes. I had to work two jobs to properly provide for my family, and it was hard, for both of us. But I never wanted my wife to “work” as many other wives did. For one thing, I derive great satisfaction that I was able to provide for my family myself. (Maybe just my male ego, but I don’t think so.) I suspect your husband also has that satisfaction. And many years later, as a retiree, I’m still able to work part time, and spend all the time I want with my wife. We aren’t rich, but we’re doing okay.

      The few times my wife became apologetic for not “contributing” to the family income, I would get upset and say “Stop it!” There is nothing to apologize for. And as far as well-meaning attempts to put a dollar value on what you do, stop that, too. You can’t put a value on that, because women like you are priceless. I know. I married one.

      So make your date box, enjoy the time with your husband, draw closer to each other, and be thankful for the way God has provided for your family. Bask in each other’s love and give the give of yourselves to each other. That’s priceless, too.

    2. You don’t have to have a degree or certification to teach and, if you are teaching your children, you ARE a teacher. If your husband said you do “nothing” that would be a huge lie. Your husband is a smart man who sees the great value in you and in what you are doing. You are one blessed woman! Like RS said, look at yourself from God’s perspective and ask Him to remove your erroneous beliefs and replace them with truth. Would you ever say of other homeschooling moms (with outside jobs or not) that they do “nothing”? Of course not! Btw, asking for what we need/want is okay. I am learning this also. I think it’s a sign of maturity to be honest with ourselves and others about our needs and desires. We may not get it all but, if we can’t ask for it we probably never get it.

    3. I’m not going to say much more than the great replies here, but if you really want to hear me rant, let’s talk about women judging each other for their work choices. This is a sensitive spot for me, because it is hard enough to run a household and be a mother without us judging each other for whether you work full-time, work part-time, work flex-time, stay at home and care for kids, homeschool, etc.

      We love our families, and we do what we think is best for them. And I support that entirely! Full-time working moms, good for you. Homeschooling moms, good for you. And all those in between. But you do not have to make an income to provide VALUE to your family.

      1. One question could be asked which would put things in a clear light. If an income-producing wife (or husband, for that matter) stops producing income because of a serious health issue, do they lose their “value?” Of course not! Every family is unique, but we’re all the same in one way: each member of the family has intrinsic value, because of who they are, not because of what they contribute financially.

  4. Well bad news about the date box. My stupidest idea ever. I’ve gotta toss it and I guess I’ll just run out and buy him something.

    He came home from work early. First, we got in a little tiff because of another story for another day. Then we made up and he says “I was gonna ask if you wanted to go to the mall and get *** (which is a certain snack that we used to love but have not had for years). It ALSO happens to be the first plan I made for one of our dates this winter!!! So I’m like, “ugh! Were you on my computer?” And he acts like “no, not at all, why?” But really? He just HAPPENED to have the exact same idea? I don’t think so. And now I’m stuck because I can’t tell him why his question frustrated me because it will ruin his gift, but does it matter, because the gift has been ruined already if he just happened to come up with the same idea I used for our first date, even though we haven’t done this in 10 years! So back to the drawing board….

    I’m kinda mad that I tried to think positively and do something nice, just to find out it was a stupid idea. So I ve gotta scrap the whole box, act like I don’t care that it was a waste of time, AND go out into the crowds to buy him something at the last minute. I should have never done this in the first place. I can’t wait for January. * sigh *

    1. YES, IT COULD TOTALLY BE COINCIDENCE!!! I’ve had weird moments with my husband or friends when we thought of the same thing and it felt like maybe some force was invading both of our minds at the same time. How about the Holy Spirit? I don’t know if that’s it, but I wouldn’t put it past God to work in those “mysterious ways.”

      Chuck the ONE DATE that’s a repeat, and stick with the plan! PLEASE. I really think this a great idea and your husband would appreciate the effort you put into it. It’s not stupid or wasted at all. Just relax and enjoy that he wanted to take you somewhere fun, and then give him the gift you originally intended to give him.

      1. I guess it could be a coincidence, but I don’t really believe in coincidences. I take it more as a sign that the gift was a bad idea and needed to be thrown away.
        I’m not as upset as I was this morning, but I hate when I think something’s a good idea, only to realize I was just being stupid or naive, or thinking it was special when it was dumb. It’s like the birthday lingerie escapade – I thought it was a special idea and it backfired horrendously (mostly due to me trying to be positive about something. Sure I can be a pessimist, but this is exactly why. Try something that’s supposed to be sweet and unselfish, and it backfires). I’m just thankful this happened BEFORE I had the nerve to act important enough to him to give him such a gift and I very well could have ruined his Christmas. He’ll be much happier with a new wallet or something.

        I thought about just scrapping the first date, since he will think I stole his idea, even though I thought of it days ago – but it’s too strong of a feeling that the box needs to go. I had no right to just “assume” he would want to spend that much time with me. So I’m kind of thankful this happened before I made a fool out of myself by acting like I was important to him. In the long run, it’s a good thing.

        1. So here are words you used in this last comment to refer to yourself or what you did: bad idea, stupid, naive, dumb, pessimist, ruined, fool. Would you ever use those words to refer to someone you love? How about someone God loves and says is valuable — you? You are drawing conclusions that do not have support from the evidence. And I really pray you’ll take a deep breath, give yourself (and your husband) a much bigger heaping of grace, and follow through on your loving actions toward your husband.

          1. Thank you. I’m actually trying to be more positive, but it’s not easy. I apologize for my rant today. It’s no excuse, but the normal holiday stress, kids with bronchitis, and “happy” holiday extended family issues, this was just the icing on the cake.

            I’ve relaxed a bit and I’m thinking I’ll finish the box. I mean, I already put a lot of time into it, and I was so excited about it initially. Whether or not he likes it, that’s up to him. All I can do is try.

            Part of me wants to be positive and act like a wife who is loved. Another part of me says “who are you trying to kid?” It’s a battle. The mismatched drive thing is still a painful issue (and it makes me feel as though all of my efforts even with this box are pointless) – but talking about that is like beating a dead horse. I’m trying to focus on other things.

            Thank you for the encouragement.

          2. Tell that part of you that says, “Who are you trying to kid?” that I’m coming over and smacking her if she pipes up again. Lol. 😉 And it’s okay to rant; I just want you to land in a place of grace and hope.

          3. Well, the box was very well received. Believe it or not, we even laughed about the “ruined” date for January, once he realized why I got so upset when he had suggested the exact same thing a few days before Christmas. Before he read it, he really couldn’t understand why I was so bent out of shape about cinnamon rolls. In the end it was pretty much good. (Still feels kind of like begging for attention, but he seemed happy, so we’ll call it a win).

  5. I love the date box/jar idea, because we’re so busy with our college classes that we can get caught up in all of the craziness. I also like the calendar with a intimacy theme for each month. We might sit down on New Year’s Eve (after our celebration with our small group from church) to plan out our 2017 intimacy calendar together.

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