Daily Archives: August 1, 2011

Sex, Schwarzenegger & Supper

I recently explained to a friend that my husband should tout me as the best wife:  While looking at vacation options, I noted that there is a Minor League Baseball All-Star Game in Pennsylvania and thought that would be a great vacation destination!   Now how many women want a sports event to be the center of their next trip?

For a long time, in fact, I’ve seen myself as quite a catch.  I’m not perfect, of course.  In fact, I can sum up my qualities with Sex, Schwarzenegger, and Supper. 

Sex.  Perhaps I’m not your typical gal.  I enjoy physical intimacy and crave it.  I think about it.  I read up about it.  I talk about it.  I make plans for it.  At times, I initiate it.

It’s not always this way, of course.  But, by and large, my husband should be dropping to his knees daily and thanking God above that his wife is a willing participant in the Bedroom Games.

Arnold Schwarzenegger in Terminator

Arnold Schwarzenegger
in Terminator

Schwarzenegger.  I love action movies!  In fact, I’d rather watch a killing-a-minute Schwarzenegger film over a tear-a-minute drama any day.  I could watch Die Hard, Running Man, Highlander, and Lara Croft: Tomb Raider over and over and over.  I love saying “I’ll be back” in an Austrian accent.  How many wives beg their husbands to take them to X-Men and couldn’t care less about The Notebook?  Okay, now my husband should be on his knees with tears running down his face at his dumb luck!

Supper.  Remember I said that I’m not perfect?  Well, I can’t cook.  Actually, I can’t cook well.  For some reason, I cannot for the life of me cook meat to its proper temperature and tenderness.  Half of my meals are dry and overcooked.  I have a range of about ten good meals, and then I’m stumped.  In the question of “Would you rather have a maid, a chauffeur, a gardener, or a cook?” I’m hands-down all for the cook!  If the way to every man’s heart truly was through his stomach, I would be destined to a life of loneliness and Lean Cuisine.

But I agree completely with Meat Loaf that “two out of three ain’t bad.”  Maybe I can’t cook like the Rachel Ray or Paula Deen, but I am eager to hop into bed and can quote Terminator lines.  And there’s still that vacation idea of mine!  Hey, I’m still a good catch!

So what’s the area of expertise or interest for which your husband should sing your praises?  Maybe you are the new Julia Child or you can replace a car battery (like my girlfriend did — You go, girl!) or you homeschool your twelve children.  Just remember you don’t have to be good at or interested in everything!   No one is.  But what makes you a great catch?

Hubbies: Feel free to tell us what makes your wife a great catch!

“Her children arise and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praises her:  ‘Many women do noble things, but you surpass them all.’”

Proverbs 31:28-29