Comments on: Hello Facebook, Goodbye Old Boyfriend

By: Mrs. Right

Mrs. Right — Wed, 13 Mar 2013 18:44:09 +0000

I don't have any old boyfriends, but I do have an ex-husband. The divorce wasn't pleasant, but for the sake of our children I never tried to turn them away from him. I would now consider him a friend, and my husband is okay with that, but we haven't spoken in over two years, and I'm okay with that, too. There was a time in the past where we had to speak to each other and work together for the sake of our children and what was going on in our lives at the time, but not any longer.

I have seen what seemed to be loving, perfect, Christian marriages fall apart when the wife caught up with old "friends", for instance getting ready for class reunions, and this was before facebook, but not email. I agree that social networks are not to blame, just as guns are not to blame for shooting deaths, BUT they are tools that can be wielded for all the wrong reasons and can therefore contribute to the death of a marriage.

By: Suse

Suse — Fri, 20 Jan 2012 23:28:28 +0000

I had an ex try to friend me, but it had ended really badly and I couldn’t figure out why the heck he wanted to friend me…see, after we broke up he became my stalker and it was terrfying. Even though I am now married and have been with my husband for 11 years, and I believe my ex is also married, who would want and ex that became a stalker to be a friend on FB…sooooo not happening!!!

By: Anonymous

Anonymous — Sat, 03 Sep 2011 13:35:21 +0000

Thankfully I married my first & only boyfriend. So I don’t have to worry about this. However, my husband isn’t friends with his ex on fb, they never speak. Out of respect to me, and he just generally has nothing to say to her 🙂

By: J

Mon, 29 Aug 2011 21:33:36 +0000

P.S. to Christy – I enjoy being stalked virtually! Thanks for the compliment!

@ Misty – Glad you are enjoying my blog!

By: J

Mon, 29 Aug 2011 21:31:25 +0000

This time around, I simply watched the comments roll in on this post. I was moved by certain stories related to this topic. I don’t think there is a right/wrong on whether to befriend old flames, but I do encourage you to ask questions and consider your decision. It’s important to think about and discuss boundaries with your spouse. You need to find mutually agreeable ways to protect your relationship. Thanks so much for your input!

By: Christy

Christy — Thu, 25 Aug 2011 23:51:58 +0000

Yup’ nothing good can come from being “friends” with old boyfriends/girlfriends. Everyone no matter how “godly” or on track they are is capable of missing the mark. And when your married missing the “mark” has the potential to hurt lots of people. I LOVE your blog and am adding you to my blog stalking list! 🙂

By: Anonymous

Anonymous — Thu, 25 Aug 2011 00:54:13 +0000

Great post! I think befriending exes could be dangerous an “innocent” looking thing which could be an open door to an emotional and/or physical affair. athough some exes with whom I had close friendships with cross my mind and honestly, I wonder how’s life for them. I still undertstand the threat. I love my husband and am happily married and would never cheat on him, but I don understand that the enemy has plans for my marriage just like God does and My husband and I set clear boundaries in all areas to keep our marriage in line with God’s plan. great post and I love how you hesitated and made what I consider the right choic,e before you accepted that request.

By: Misty Lynn Walker

Misty Lynn Walker — Thu, 25 Aug 2011 00:26:23 +0000

I agree. And like your blog! Thank you for sharing.

By: Merritt | LiveSimplyLove

Merritt | LiveSimplyLove — Wed, 24 Aug 2011 05:33:07 +0000

I agree. There’s no reason to go there. I’ve had a few ex-boyfriends try to friend me. Ignoring it is the best option, especially if there’s some sense of curiosity peaked when the request comes in. I’m human and know that I don’t want to give the enemy any room to mess with my mind now or in the future. I have several friends who combined FB pages when they got married. We haven’t done that, but we do have very open and honest conversations when there’s a fly-by appearance from an ex. Great post!

By: ednivet

ednivet — Tue, 23 Aug 2011 21:39:04 +0000

My wife and I share a FB acc. so that there will be no questions as to who, what & where. My friends are her friends and the same goes for her, even if I never meet them be4.
We are both on 2nd marriage and it’s been God’s grace for 16 years but I won’t give the enemy of our souls room for temptation. Even our email acc. our together.
In Christ we are ONE and in the social network as well.