Daily Archives: September 20, 2012

How to Try New Sexual Positions

Some time ago, I wrote a post called Mission Position about seeking new positions for lovemaking. If you want to click over and read it first, I’ll wait.

I was recently in a secondhand bookstore perusing the shelves and, as usual these days, ended up in the sexuality section. I like to see what’s being published and read on this topic, especially those books written by Christian authors. On this visit, I picked up a book on sexual positions. (One caveat: I never open up the sex books with photography to illustrate.) In it were some interesting configurations, along with a drawing of a woman in a back bend and the man thrusting into her.

Seriously? A back bend? I’ve also seen a drawing of a man in a back bend with the woman on top. Who does that? Circus people?!! I was both intrigued and appalled that anyone would get into that position to have sex.

That said, there are a lot of sexual positions worth trying. Some provide more access to view each other, some more control for one partner or the other, and some provide different sensations. So let’s say you want to try a new sexual position. How do you know what to try? Besides a back bend (heaven help us all), what are the options?

What I’ve figured out is that all of those positions suggested in books (like the 64 positions of the Kama Sutra) are really variations on a theme.

FIRST, THERE IS RELATIVE POSITIONING.

Man on top. Face-to-face, husband on top, and wife underneath.

Woman on top. Also face-to-face but wife on top, husband underneath.

Side by side. A couple facing each other side by side.

Rear entry. Husband entering wife’s vagina from behind.

NEXT, THERE IS GENERAL POSITIONING.

Lying down. Husband and wife are mostly lying down.

Kneeling. One or both are on your knees.

Sitting. The wife sits on her husband’s lap.

Standing. Both husband and wife standing up.

THIRD, THERE IS THE ANGLE OF YOUR TORSO AND LIMBS — MAINLY WIFE.

Crouched. Your torso is bent. For a wife, this usually means bending at the waist to create a shorter distance between entry and the end of her vagina. Bending in this way can increase the likelihood of her husband thrusting into her elusive G-spot.

Spread wide. The wife spreads her legs wide which gives the best access for viewing, touch, and entry. In this position, the husband may be able to go deeper into her vagina as well.

Legs together. When a wife keeps her legs together, it can create greater friction on the man’s penis and squeeze the opening a bit to provide more pressure.

Legs bent. One or both legs can be bent just slightly, moderately, or with the wife’s knees all the way up to her chest. Each configuration provides a different sensation to both the husband and wife. In particular, the knees-to-chest position can feel more intense and allow the penis to brush against the wife’s G-spot.

Legs up. Throwing your legs up in the air may feel awkward at first, but lifting the legs up changes the angle of the body as well. A wife can even drape her legs over her husband’s shoulders.

It is my contention that you can come up with all kinds of positions by simply playing mix-and-match here. Let me show you what I mean.

DISCLAIMER: I am a terrible artist. However, since I didn’t want anything too graphic here, I decided that stick figures would work just fine for my purposes. Thus, the following are my own pitiful renderings of the sexual positions. Nothing shown below should be attempted based on an erroneous belief that these stick figures are anything like the real you. But I tried.

MIX AND MATCH.

So here’s your typical sexual position: Man on top, lying down, spread wide.

Now here’s Man on top, standing, legs up.

Well, that’s different.

How about woman on top, sitting, legs bent?

Rear entry, kneeling, legs together?

You see what I mean? You can achieve numerous positions just with these basics (and I am a terrible artist).

Also, wives, tilting your hips is another way to shift the angle and feel something different. For example, in that last position, the wife can move her chest toward the bed or ground and tilt her hips up to meet her husband. In the missionary position, she can tilt her hips up off the bed.

If you’ve never tried anything adventurous in this area, start small. Keep the other two positions as usual and change the third. For instance, keep direction and general position and change the angle. Or keep direction and angle and change general position. You get the idea.

By the way, many scholars believe that Song of Songs 2:6 is a reference to a sexual position: “His left arm is under my head, and his right arm embraces me.” It sounds like side by side to me, but it certainly doesn’t appear to be the missionary position (man on top). So I guess the Lover and the Beloved were a little adventurous themselves.