If I may chime in–I think it is important to be willing to answer questions, but at the same time, please allow me to be honest. My parents do not have a very good or happy relationship, including what I imagine (but have certainly never asked) to be a not-so-great sex life. As a result, although I tried very hard to educate myself through this blog and others like it, reading a few Christian books on marriage and marital intimacy, etc., I never asked either of my parents a single question about sex. Frankly, I didn’t want their advice. I saw all too clearly that what they had wasn’t working, and I didn’t want any part of it. I didn’t want a bad or warped perspective on sex in marriage and God’s plan for me and my (then) fiance.

I don’t know your situation and wouldn’t dare to hand out cut-and-paste advice on what you should do, but if there is anything you can do to improve your own marriage and sex life, that would be an incredible testimony to those who are looking forward to marriage and hoping for mentors or question-answer-ers. I spent most of my teen years and the first few years of college not even sure if I wanted to get married, because I had seen the misery and loneliness that could come from being in a lifelong relationship with someone you didn’t like anymore. It wasn’t until I got to know my husband’s family and church community and saw some solid marriages that I got some confidence that things could be great and was able to have the nerve to accept a marriage proposal and marry. I determined in my early teens that I would rather be single than endure a miserable marriage. For all I know you are already doing everything in your power to improve your marriage, but if you’re not–I beg you, prioritize this relationship and cover it with prayer and do everything you can to turn things around!! God bless.

Thanks, Keelie! Good for your parents. 🙂

A honeymoon kit? What a FABULOUS idea.

I’ve wondered that too — if it’s hard to discuss something so wonderful and then say “but don’t do it!” But it’s funny how it doesn’t seem to work that way. I think more teens and singles get intrigued by sex because they don’t hear the truth about it, and then they want to go experience it for themselves.

If we share God’s truth about sex, I think it gives them a reason to wait…so they can have all the blessings in store for them.

I don’t think you have to go into much detail about your own sex life with someone. Rather, you can speak to the wisdom of the Bible and tips for better sexual intimacy in marriage. Go ahead and talk to someone, give them what you can give.

It breaks my heart that you boldly approached people and were turned away. I pray that you use your experience to turn around and bless those behind you, with the wisdom you’ve gained. May God bless your marriage bed again and again!

Do not stay quiet! You don’t need to fill your kids on what your sex life is like exactly; frankly, they don’t want to hear anything like that. Rather, teach them God’s design for sexuality while striving for it yourself in your marriage. You can tell your kids that fabulous sex isn’t a guarantee in marriage, but rather something you have to desire and seek. But please don’t stay silent because you don’t have everything figured out just yet. Your kids need you to faithfully deliver the biblical message.

GREAT question.

Amazing how the truth is the best thing to tell, huh? Of course, I believe in tailoring the message to age and stage, but sex shouldn’t be a forbidden topic. God never seemed to shy away from it.

Thanks, Greg.