Not sure what all is going on. But I understand your decision. In fact, I wrote once about Should You Be Reading My Blog?.

Saying a prayer for you.

Hello Claire,

I really feel for you. It sounds like you’re in a lot of pain.

It sounds like your relationship with God is strong, and that’s fantastic.

This may be hard to hear, but the feelings you’re describing sound like clinical depression. If so, the feelings aren’t likely to go away because you make a few tweaks to your life. You should see a doctor (psychiatrist) to get diagnosed. I understand that this could be embarrassing for you, but there are *many* options for treating depression that are extremely successful!

Your husband and kids love you and need you to be healthy. You owe it to yourself and to them. Please talk to a doctor about what you’re going through.

You had kindly planned to do a Q&A for me, but please know that I will not see it. If it would be helpful for others, please go ahead, but otherwise, I would not wish you to waste your time.

Thank you again for your kindness and desire to help.

Nope, you’re not “blowing up” my blog. Not at all. But you do sound like I felt at the worst point of my marriage. And I want you to know that I am in a very happy marriage now, so things can change and improve in ways you can’t see in the midst of the pain.

Since your question is so involved, I am adding it to my Q&A list. I can’t give you an answer here worthy of your situation, so I’ll try to do a post soon. Saying a prayer for you. Many blessings!

That’s not correct. Studies of what’s called “desire discrepancy” have shown that there is no statistically significant difference between men and women when it comes to who has the higher drive in a relationship. The stereotype that most men are “easy” and always ready to go, waiting for their wives to make a move, is just not backed up by research.

This woman’s problem is not that she isn’t being aggressive enough or that she’s unusual in having a higher drive than her husband.

So sorry to bring this up but what you describe happened to me & it took many years to come out that my husband’s reluctance was due to a porn addiction. I hope & pray this isn’t the case for you but I would give anything to have found out earlier. Maybe you might need to dig deeper…