Oh my goodness, Morgan. I’m so sad that is happening to you. Clearly, his actions are not okay. Given the length of time without and your husband’s responses, you may need to step up and go further with your actions. Rather than detail that here, let me suggest reading this post from Sheila Gregoire of To Love Honor & Vacuum: Reader Question: Do I Have To Live with a Sexless Marriage?

Ah yes, then I definitely see what you mean. Thanks for clarifying! Indeed, we have body chemicals released when we make love. (Maybe I had too many psychology classes. 😉 )

I guess I was looking at “sex as a drug” in a biochemical sense in how it releases dopamine and oxytocin (the feel good and bonding neurotransmitters) as well as how it reduces blood pressure and stress and improves sleep. Perhaps I’ve had one too many science classes.

Thank you for your blessings! I will say, menopause has been challenging. I am under the care of a great gyn. You are right, menopause does not mean the end of intimacy. Though it has required some creative readjustments 🙂

Perhaps it depends on what you mean by “sex as a drug.” If you’re thinking about a chemical your body needs (like penicillin or insulin to a diabetic), yeah, sure. But if someone said to me that sex in marriage is like cocaine, I’d highly disagree. Cocaine doesn’t give a flip about you, but your mate should be an intimate partner in this God-given experience.

I feel for you, Deb, since your libidos are now so different. I suggest talking to your doctor about your post-menopausal drop in sex drive. Sexual intimacy doesn’t need to cease after you pass that milestone. Many blessings to you and your husband!

I’ve never looked at sex as a drug before, but your description sure makes it sound like one.
I guess I could say that sex is my husbands drug of choice.

I’m also finding that it is more the lack of physical affection than the lack of orgasms that is making me irritable. I think I would gladly trade 5 orgasms for the promise of a daily heartfelt passionate kiss.

We men are far more hormonal and emotional than even we want to admit.

Whoa, that’s a great observation about yourself. I do notice that sometimes my husband is much more likely to respond to me with a negative assumption and I wonder if it has anything to do with the times we have gone a couple days more than we’d like.