Comments on: Are Women Harming Male Body Image?

By: M

Tue, 09 Jul 2019 23:48:08 +0000

I’m gonna go out on a limb and say that I think what you want to feel is value and worth, Brian. Our culture has put a crazy amount of value on our physical bodies, which is so shallow and sad. But I think if you truly found your value and identity in Christ and His love for you, you wouldn’t want so badly for women to lust after you when you walk into a room. You would realize that is actually of no real worth (and troublesome for the women themselves). I don’t know, maybe that’s not what the issue is for you. But it’s a lesson I had to learn myself.

By: Jonathan

Jonathan — Sun, 17 Feb 2019 13:33:14 +0000

In reply to Brian. I think what we find attractive can change, has for me a couple times. Now my wife is the standard for me. Nobody else could ever come close. The rest of your comment, spot on. Hypocrisy, impossible expectations and laziness in appearance is destroying intimacy.

By: Brian

Brian — Sat, 02 Feb 2019 00:34:27 +0000

Well, I definitely don’t want to get into the whole definition of objectification again. I really don’t know any other way to put it other than more or less what happens on any Facebook post with Jason Momoa’s picture. Yes, I would like that to happen to me. Call it what you want. I’m sure women hate it. I don’t have to understand why.

By: J

Fri, 01 Feb 2019 23:57:14 +0000

In reply to Brian. I think I get what you're saying, Brian, but using the "objectified" word is a big turn-off for so many women who have fought that burden for so long. That's why I'm so adamant here. But yeah, to have your physical appearance admired and appreciated, I can understand that. "Objectified"? No.

By: Brian

Brian — Fri, 01 Feb 2019 23:45:08 +0000

In reply to J.

I don’t know what it would be like to be objectified all the time. This is true and I admit it. I’m sure that after. Few years it would get old. But would it feel amazing to have it happen for a while? I feel it would even if I don’t know with certainty.

By the way, I’m not saying that I SHOULD want to feel this way. It’s pure vanity at its core. But let me tell you, that if that were my picture being spread around the internet with crude comments from women about how attractive I look to them, I can’t help but think that it would put me on cloud 9 even if it’s wrong to think that way.

Anyway, this is not productive and misses the point of your post, so I’m sorry for derailing things.

By: J

Fri, 01 Feb 2019 23:18:25 +0000

In reply to Brian.

Then with all due respect, how do you know what’s it like to be objectified all the time? And those men rarely complaining about it? No, not aloud. Because clearly that wouldn’t be acceptable to a group of men to say, “Oh, I hate how women only love me for my body.” Even if it’s true.

Look, this isn’t even a gender thing. It’s not a Christian viewpoint to objectify a person based entirely on their appearance!

By: Terry

Terry — Fri, 01 Feb 2019 21:07:56 +0000

In reply to J.

J, I stand corrected if this is not true. Again this is simply an impression I’ve gained over the years, observing men’s behavior and hearing their comments (albeit mostly on TV) on the kind of attention they’d like to receive from women. And the second observation actually comes from a Christian radio DJ – not that men actually have an easier time losing weight and/or becoming fit but that (maybe?) they don’t see it as as daunting a task as women do.

By: Brian

Brian — Fri, 01 Feb 2019 20:56:59 +0000

With all due respect, and I do respect you, how would you know? You aren’t a man. You don’t know what it’s like to never be noticed by the opposite sex because women have it thrown at them. Yes, I’d love the thought that I could walk in a room and have all the women’s heads turn. It would flatter me immensely, and it wouldn’t bother me one bit that they weren’t looking at me as a full person. I wouldn’t acknowledge it because I’m married, but it would still make me feel good. And guess what…there are men who get objectified for their looks and these men rarely complain about it.

By: J

Fri, 01 Feb 2019 20:43:44 +0000

In reply to Brian.

Ugh. That is NOT EVEN TRUE. If men were regularly objectified for their bodies, they would know what it feels like and stop idealizing that kind of attention. Please don’t make something sound great that is appalling: valuing someone solely for their body parts.

Now if you tell me that you’d like your body to be seen, appreciated, attended to, loved, etc. as part of the whole package, you betcha! I get it, and I think we wives should do that more.

But really, guys don’t want to be objectified either. If they knew how it felt, they wouldn’t say that.

By: Brian

Brian — Fri, 01 Feb 2019 14:39:47 +0000

Honestly, I’d love to be objectified for my body, and when my wife compliments me it makes me feel like a superhero. That said, I don’t think men have the same level of body insecurities as women, simply because we know that women don’t place quite as much importance on physical attractiveness as men do. I am curious what you meant when you said men can change our appearance easier. I don’t think that’s correct, unless you’re saying that men have higher testosterone and thus we can build muscle and lose weight easier than women. The truth is, almost every wife could be exactly the body type their husband wanted most if they worked hard enough. He married you. You ARE this type, or at least you were.