Comments on: 5 Things that Burn Me Out on Marriage Ministry

By: J

Thu, 10 Oct 2019 19:09:51 +0000

In reply to Chris. Thank you! And I'm trying to get back to twice a week, which seems to be the sweet spot of blogging for me.

By: Chris

Chris — Thu, 10 Oct 2019 18:46:27 +0000

This is my day to catch up on your blog. I am also motivated to make some comments. I appreciate your blog, as you tend to give very balanced ideas and opinions without getting into other areas of theological debate. My mind, as well as my wife’s mind, is made up in the theological arguments between patriarchy and egalitarian theology. I am not here to argue about it. I would prefer to read about the topic on hand;what can be done to enhance the relationship of spouses within a marriage and improve intimacy in and out of the bedroom. So, your articles are really appreciated.

Also, I noticed that you seem to have a regular schedule for posting new articles, and I think that is smart. It is good to have a balanced life and ensure that you have time for your relationship with Christ, time for yourself, and time for your family.

By: J

Mon, 07 Oct 2019 00:30:33 +0000

In reply to Lauren.

Great idea! I finally put up a Support My Ministry button (for donations) on the sidebar, which probably appears beneath the blog post on a mobile phone. And I’m figuring out how to make that more prominent. I’ve had a Patreon page for a while, but people shouldn’t go there yet, because I haven’t automated the rewards yet. On my crazy-long to-do list!

Thanks so much.

By: Lauren

Lauren — Sun, 06 Oct 2019 21:40:42 +0000

I love your balanced approach that comes from a counselor’s perspective!

Maybe a PayPal link or Patreon account? At some point, your main readers have purchased your resources, but are still benefitting from the blog so donations/subscriptions could be the way to go. I know podcast and YouTube creators who have Patreon accounts that have just a one time donation/payment or low monthly subscriptions $5, sometimes for access to exclusive content.

The Homesick Texan (food blogger) went to a subscription site to keep doing what she loved and stay afloat. You deserve pay for the thoughtful, consistent work you put in to build this site. Blessings!

By: R

Wed, 02 Oct 2019 23:12:04 +0000

Please don’t go the ads route, unless they’re ads for your own stuff.

Most people believe selling is about getting people to buy stuff they don’t want – this couldn’t be further from the truth. It’s about helping people get from a “before” state that they’re unhappy with to an “after” state that they long to be in. They simply need to know that your product/service will get them there.

By: J

Fri, 27 Sep 2019 02:15:58 +0000

In reply to Ol'Will. I've watched a lot of their videos. They're funny!

By: J

Fri, 27 Sep 2019 02:15:38 +0000

In reply to B. I have wondered how things are going. Good to hear, B!

By: J

Fri, 27 Sep 2019 02:14:54 +0000

In reply to Wayne Shaw. Verlander and baseball are always worth discussing! Go, 'Stros! :)

By: Wayne Shaw

Wayne Shaw — Thu, 26 Sep 2019 22:17:14 +0000

Lou Gehrig, yes, one of my very favorites of the before-I-was-even-born generation!

I’m still reading you these days, just commenting less, but I feel ya on the burnout stuff. It can hit any of us from multiple sources.

(Oh and congrats to your Astros! I still want Verlander back, though, especially after this horrific season….I know, I’ll stop. I’m veering way off topic.)

By: B

Thu, 26 Sep 2019 14:22:05 +0000

For the most part, this is why I stopped commenting here. I felt I was the one burning everyone out. I don’t want to be that person. I found solace in a couple blogs, a place I could try to be heard and have someone communicate with me. During our deepest troubles, my husband didn’t hear me. He was so deep in his own issues. I’d endure a minimum of an hour of being screamed at, per day. It was rough. No I wasn’t perfect, but I also felt SO lonely.
We went to counseling, and it helped my husband, but then the counselor said we’d done well and we were done. I was SO SAD. I hadn’t had a turn to even bring up my own issues, let alone work on them. I felt brushed off, again, and it kind of cemented the idea Id learned from my childhood, that I was basically worthless, just someone who took up space.
But in a blog that’s hard to convey. People tend to get upset that you won’t just listen to them and smile and act confident and all will be well. It was a really tough decade of my life.
I started to feel like in my desperation to get anyone to understand, or even care at all, or yes even validate that I was in fact having an emotion – be it right or wrong – I talked WAY too much. Or typed way too much I should say. So I stopped. I figured if my problems/issues were meant to be, was it really fair to burden the blog folks? No, of course it wasn’t.
I’m pleased to report that things in my marriage have changed for the better. My husband is much more relaxed and willing to communicate with me. He’s acting like he loves me. He says he always has, very much, but never knew how to express it. Things aren’t perfect, but at least now he and I are able to talk about things together, as versus me pouring my guts out on a blog just to end up getting everyone else all mad. So that’s a positive change and how it should be.

Please accept my apologies if I’ve been the cause of any burn out. I know I haven’t in the last few months because I’ve been making a concerted effort to remain quiet. ? But in the past I know I’d go on, unproductively, and for that I apologize.
Please hang in there. You kept me going at a time when I very much needed support to stay afloat.