Comments on: Which Sex Books Should You Read?

By: Bill

Bill — Wed, 12 Apr 2023 11:56:24 +0000

Thank you for this list. I especially like how you make clear that not all books on sex suit all audiences and marriages. Much depends on where a couple and each spouse is currently at. I’m not sure I’ve seen anyone really make that distinction so systematically before.

The vast majority of Christian resources on sex (not yours!) seem to start from certain, usually unspoken, assumptions and go from there – not really giving space to the fact that there is a huge variety of situations out there. At most they get a footnote or brief aside.

By: J

Wed, 22 Mar 2023 16:55:42 +0000

In reply to HappyYearsTogether. Yeah, I haven't gotten to that one either yet, though I've heard great things about Rosenau. It's on my list!

By: HappyYearsTogether

HappyYearsTogether — Wed, 22 Mar 2023 03:44:44 +0000

Doug Rosenau’s “A Celebration of Sex” should be on this list. I especially remember the chapter on massage; intimacy can be built up in so many different ways.

Also: Awesome, Chris, praying for you now <3

By: J

Tue, 21 Mar 2023 02:08:42 +0000

In reply to Chris. Wow.

By: Chris

Chris — Mon, 20 Mar 2023 23:16:40 +0000

OK, so there are times when God moves in such a way that I am overwhelmed. My wife and I talked about her response to a recent attempt to initiate by me. I was really having some strong emotions about it but I really don’t like to talk about it. I don’t want her to feel pressured and I am not very good at sharing those feelings with anyone. She surprised me this morning saying she ordered a couple of books to help our marriage. Unfortunately, the books did not look like they would be very helpful. However, she is now getting your book, which we will read together, as well as your devotional. What an incredible move by God. Will life be perfect? Nope. I am far from perfect so that is not possible. But I am seeung God move.

By: J

Sat, 18 Mar 2023 01:02:09 +0000

In reply to Chris. So well said. At the end of the day, it's about standing before God able to proclaim you loved as best you could.

By: Chris

Chris — Fri, 17 Mar 2023 23:25:30 +0000

In reply to J. We have been married for over 30 years, so I know what to expect. I am not deprived of time together, just not in the frequency I would like, and for that I am grateful. It just isn't what I hoped for in my youth. I would absolutely love to have my initiations responded to, but that is not something I think will ever happen. And I really appreciate your articles. They are very helpful and give me a hope for the future. Regardless, I am committed to my wife, even though I find that she absolutely takes me for granted. It is not about her but my relationship with Jesus.

By: J

Fri, 17 Mar 2023 15:04:15 +0000

In reply to Chris. Thanks for reading. And I yet pray for her to embrace that emotional safety in your marriage and open up to greater intimacy. Blessings to you both!

By: Chris

Chris — Fri, 17 Mar 2023 12:25:22 +0000

My wife and I are very particular about what we read, regardless of the topic. It must line up with scripture, the ultimate source of truth, or it gets tossed. That doesn’t mean I have to agree with everything, but the clear principles in scripture are a must. We can disagree about the less clear subjects (want to discuss predestination or the end times? Yeah, I didn’t think so. Grin). The one book we have read and appreciated is The Act of Marriage, by Tim and Beverly Lahaye, which by now is probably outdated for today. We have read some of Gary Smalley’s other books and found them to be very good. I will have to look at the links you provided.

While I have visited other websites, yours is the only one I stop by on a regular basis, because I am convinced you seek to share biblical truth and not bend to modern trends or political correctness. Unfortunately, my wife doesn’t seek out Godly advice on intimacy, so it becomes a one-sided effort. However, she experienced sexual abuse early in her adulthood, which has made me cautious in this area. It isn’t something we talk about, so I don’t really know how it affects her these days. I simply try to give her a safe place to live life and serve Jesus.