Hot, Holy & Humorous Marriage Cruise

Cruise. Connect. Cultivate.
October 14-21, 2023

Cruise

We leave from Galveston, Texas on October 14, 2023, sail on the Carnival Vista to the Western Caribbean with stops in Jamaica, Grand Cayman, and Cozumel, and return on the 21st.

Connect

You’ll connect with your spouse through interactive workshops, onboard fun, shore excursions of your choice, and private time alone. You’ll also connect with other couples on the cruise, with host J. Parker & her husband (aka “Spock), and with special guests Brad and Kate Aldrich of One Flesh Marriage and Still Becoming One.

Cultivate Better Intimacy

Sail days include workshops designed to help you better understand God’s design for sex, your own marriage’s particular challenges and opportunities, and how to build better marital intimacy that includes mutually satisfying sex. But all events and experiences are geared toward helping you create and cultivate healthier, holier, and happier sexual intimacy in your marriage.

This cruise is not intended for couples in crisis. If you are dealing with sexual betrayal, physical or emotional abuse, or in the midst of divorce proceedings or a separation, please seek resources that address your specific situation better—such as a marriage intensive or professional therapy.

Cost

For $2500 per couple, you receive:

  • Interior Stateroom (taxes & fees included)
  • All meals provided by the ship (specialty restaurants excluded)
  • Onboard entertainment and shows
  • All conference workshops and events
  • One-on-one session with licensed marriage therapist Brad and his wife Kate, a certified life coach
  • Prepare|Enrich assessment and results
  • Group dining so you can get to know other couples (including your hosts!)
  • Access to our closed Facebook group
  • Signed copy of Pillow Talk: 40 Conversations About Sex for Married Couples

Space is limited to the first 15 couples! So act quickly.

Hosts

J. Parker is the voice of Hot, Holy & Humorous. She has been married to her husband for 30 years and has two grown sons. Check out her full bio here.

J. Parker will present several workshops on the topic of growing healthy and holy sexual intimacy in your marriage, as well as lead couples’ activities designed to increase understanding and connection. J’s husband will join her on the Q&A panel, along with our guest speakers.

Guest Speakers

Brad & Kate Aldrich have been married for 21 years and have four wonderful kids. It was through God healing their own marriage that Aldrich Ministries and the marriage blog One Flesh Marriage was born. And they now have a podcast as well—Still Becoming One. Brad is a Pennsylvania Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, and both Brad and Kate are Bridges Certified Life Coaches. Together they run marriage groups, speak, and write about all things marriage. Brad also offers online marriage and individual counseling and coaching through video conferencing.

Brad & Kate will present one workshop, participate in a Q&A panel, and provide a private coaching session for each couple on board.

Itinerary

Day 1: Departure
Check-in / Reception
Safety Drill / Depart Galveston TX
Dining with Group

Day 2 & 3: At Sea
Workshops with J. Parker & Brad & Kate Aldrich
Lunch on your own
One-on-one sessions with Brad & Kate
Dining with Group
Evening activity

Days 4, 5 & 6: Port Day
Shore Excursions or Stay on Ship
One-on-one sessions with Brad & Kate
Dining with Group
Evening activity

Day 7: At Sea
Workshop with J. Parker
Lunch on your own
Ask Anything panel with J, “Spock,” Brad & Kate
One-on-one sessions with Brad & Kate Aldrich
Dining with Group
Final conference activity

Day 8: Arrival
Arrive in Galveston, Texas
(No group activities)

Ports of Call

Montego Bay, Jamaica

Montego Bay, or “Mo Bay” as it’s affectionally called, has some of Jamaica’s best beaches, shopping, restaurants and golf courses. You can shop, swim, and play or sample the rich culture and history of the area. Learn more about Montego Bay here.

Grand Cayman, Cayman Islands

Spectacular beaches, rich flora and fauna, and a touch of elegance make this a tropical paradise. Kick back and relax, enjoy some of the best diving and snorkeling, get up close and personal with stingrays and turtles, or make up your own adventure! Learn more about Grand Cayman here.

Cozumel, Mexico

You can’t cruise from Galveston without stopping off at Cozumel, but that’s great because it’s a wonderful port with lots to do! Cozumel is perched atop a coral reef, meaning great snorkeling or scuba diving, and it caters to visitors with fine food, shopping, and fun. You can also enjoy ziplining, explore nearby Mayan ruins, or enjoy the gorgeous Caribbean beach. Learn more about Cozumel here.

Frequently Asked Questions

Why Carnival cruise line?

I’ve sailed several times on Royal Caribbean and twice on Carnival. In recent years, Royal has experienced some struggles while Carnival has upped its game. All in all, the better value right now seems to be on Carnival. They provide quality staterooms, excellent dining, lower-priced beverages and internet service, and ample entertainment onboard. While some ship events may be little less “our thing,” it’s more than possible aboard the Vista for Christian couples to create comfortable, enjoyable, and memorable experiences.

Why is the cruise so expensive?

You may have seen advertisements from Carnival and other cruise lines boasting cheaper rates, but those aren’t your check-out price. This cruise includes the base price of the cruise plus taxes, fees, and prepaid gratuities … times two. Then, there’s the cost of putting on a marriage retreat, which involves travel costs, time, labor, resources, etc. So, it’s a double-occupancy cruise + conference + investment in your marriage = great value!

May we bring our children?

While we view children as a beautiful blessing from God, we ask that you find someone else to watch them back at home so that you can focus on your marriage and its intimacy. Having kids to care for, even if only when the ship’s childcare is unavailable, will prevent you from being able to concentrate on and apply what we’re learning. In the end, it will greatly benefit your children to have had a vacation all your own and strengthened your marriage and thus your whole family.

Must we attend all scheduled events?

No. Your time is ultimately yours to spend as you wish. Of course, you won’t get the full benefit of this marriage cruise without engaging in the core content. But if you need a dinner-for-two or a long afternoon nap together, go for it! Prioritize what’s best for your marriage.

Will we be able to drink alcohol?

Alcohol consumption is a non-salvation issue about which good Christians can disagree. If you choose to drink, please do so responsibly. And feel free to buy your host a glass of wine at least once during the week. (Kidding! I kid.)

Must I be vaccinated against Covid-19?

Carnival dropped its Covid-19 vaccine requirement in 2022. However, we encourage you to take wise precautions, especially those at higher risk of severe consequences if they fall ill.

What about inclement weather?

Cruise ships are highly motivated to do two things: set sail and keep guests safe. If they believe they can sail safely, they will. But severe weather, such as hurricanes and tropical storms, may cause them to alter their course, change or skip a port, or cancel a cruise. Your host will stay on top of weather-related news and cruise line announcements and keep you informed of any adjustments to the plan.

Will I get seasick?

Many cruisers feel mildly nauseated the first day of sailing but acclimate quickly. A few experience motion sickness beyond the first 24 hours. Recommendations to prevent seasickness involve going outside from time to time, as viewing the horizon can help your body reorient, and taking over-the-counter medications like Bonine and Dramamine. Another option some, like me, swear by—and others, like my husband Spock, discount—is acupressure wristbands, like Sea-Band. If you experience motion sickness that’s not easily addressed, there is an onboard doctor who can help.

Should we get travel insurance?

While taxes, fees, and gratuities are all prepaid for you, the choice to get travel insurance is yours. Carnival offers a Vacation Protection plan, or you can purchase separately from any travel insurance provider. Be sure to read exactly which conditions qualify for payout.

Got another question? Shoot me an email at j@hotholyhumorous.com.

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