Natural and personal lubricants have been on my mind lately.

Too Much Wetness

First, my higher desire wife community had an interesting discussion about natural lubrication. Most of the time, sexperts like me are asked about vaginal dryness, but in fact, some wives have the opposite issue: their bodies produce more vaginal secretion than they need.

Such wives can feel self-conscious or embarrassed about how wet they, and their bed, get during sex. What can a wife do to address this situation? Here are a few options:

• Put down a towel or waterproof pad on your bed to soak up any extra.
• Keep a small towel nearby to sop up some of the fluid and get to the level you prefer.
• Consider taking a decongestant before lovemaking; it can have a drying effect not only on your sinuses but your vaginal secretions.

Meanwhile, be honest with your husband about what’s going on. A number of men believe the wetter the better, because that means a wife especially aroused. But while arousal does tend to lead to natural secretions, it’s not a guarantee and the amount is more determined by a woman’s physiology.

Explain that you need some wetness, but too much can make things more slippery than you want them to be and, for some wives, can diminish the experience.

Flavored Lubricant

Then there was the post from Julie Sibert of Intimacy in Marriage titled Pumpkin Spice or Bourbon-Scented Shampoo? Is This Sexy? in which she talked about a pumpkin-spice flavored personal lubricant.

Not long after, Julie graciously substituted in for me with the Knowing Her Sexually podcast, and as a thank you, I sent her that flavored lube. Unfortunately, I failed to tell her it was on its way! So then she wrote a second post under the impression that a random company had sent her a sample: Pumpkin Spice Lubricant? It’s a Thing.

But that got me thinking about flavored lube—specifically, what makes for a good flavor. Truth is, I’m not a fan of pumpkin-spice anything. Just like with foods, people have different tastes. So if you try a flavored lube and don’t like it, don’t assume you don’t like flavored lube at all. Try a different brand or flavor.

I personally think Sliquid and Jo brands do a good job of providing flavor without going overboard.

All About Lube

Finally, I wrote about a wife’s lubrication for the KHS Ministry website: Why Your Wife Needs Extra Lube. Intended for the husbands, I did some deep-dive research and explained what I’d learned about how a wife’s body lubricates, when it lubricates and when it doesn’t, and why supplemental lube can be a good thing for lovemaking.

Plus, I point out, gents, that her wetness is not the best evidence of your lovemaking skills. Yes, you should be attentive to the arousal and foreplay that help your wife lubricate, but sometimes a wife can be engaged mentally and not-that-wet physically. Something could be amiss, or it could just be biology.

To get that whole lowdown on lube, check out the post here:

And More on Lube

Of course, I’ve written on this topic before. Here are some more resources:

• Q&A with J: A Guide to Using Personal Lubricant
• Which Personal Lubricants Should You Try?
• 5 Tips for Choosing a Personal Lubricant

AND Sex Chat for Christian Wives still has our Oral Sex webinar (with lube info) available for replay, for ONLY $10! Or get this one and our webinars on Getting in the Mood and Orgasm for a bargain buy of $25!

The post Let’s Talk Lube appeared first on Hot, Holy & Humorous.

It was like being thrown in the feminine hygiene aisle at the arrival of your first period — at least then I had my mother there to coach me on what “wings” were. However, I was not about to call my mom for advice on personal lubricant.

So I fumbled around, tried a bunch of products, and figured out some things. Now that I’m writing this blog, I get to try even more stuff — some of it samples sent to me by manufacturers (thanks, Good Clean Love and Simply Slick!). All in the name of research. Riiight?

But I’ve decided my best research must include my fabulous readership. It would take me quite a while to try everything out there, but I have thousands of people visiting my site whom I can tap as excellent resources. (Thank you!)

I’m asking you to please take a few minutes and fill out a Personal Lubricant Survey. It’s a quick five-question form that’s mostly multiple choice. I suspect it will take less than five minutes to complete.

And it’s a way better use of your time than watching another YouTube cat video or browsing celebrity news to find the latest crazy thing Kanye West said.

You’ll be helping other couples out with your fabulous wisdom! Or maybe discovering a few things yourself.

Here it is: Personal Lubricant Survey

Just click on that link. The survey will pop up in a new window. Fill it out, and press the Done button at the end. That’s it! Easy-peasy.

I’ll take the information I receive, combine it with my own product testing, and give recommendations for married couples. Then you can confidently buy the right personal lubricant for your lovemaking.

Doesn’t that sound like a great plan?

If you want to know how to use lubricant, check out my Guide to Using Personal Lubricant.

The post Which Personal Lubricants Should You Try? appeared first on Hot, Holy & Humorous.