Hot, Holy & Humorous

Letting Go & Catching Up

Is this the only ministry I do? No one asked that in my Q&A post, but it’s relevant at the moment. On Mondays, I am answering questions posed by commenters. However, I am involved this week in an activity linked to church volunteerism in another area of ministry.

I had planned to post something entirely different today, but I had technical difficulties (translation: close to losing my religion over the Internet messing up) over the weekend when I had ample time to finish my blog entry. Instead, I am writing this post on Monday in the sliver of time that I have access to technology. It could be mere moments before someone finds me hiding in this back room and requests my help in saving souls or cleaning up vomit. It’s all for the Kingdom, right?

Frankly, I’ve been in a mental tizzy over not getting the post written because I have posted without fail every Monday since I began this blog. How could I skip one? How could I not come here and share something wonderful or interesting with you all? I’ve grown to feel that we are really are sitting around at a coffee shop chatting about godly sexuality, and I didn’t want to miss the camaraderie.

Sky & ocean with Let Go...
Photo Credit: Microsoft Word Clip Art

But sometimes you have to let go. I haven’t been able to get to the post I wanted to write. I am not going to have the time to do it right. I will not be forsaking you by pushing it off one week.

And that reminds me of sex. (Yeah, yeah, I know. Some of you think everything reminds me of sex.)

While God has obviously placed importance on this physical union of two married people as a way of expressing love, increasing intimacy, and representing Christ and the church, it’s the cumulative effect that matters — not one particular night.

Have you ever planned to have a wonderful night of intimacy with your spouse? Maybe even planned a date night with a babysitter or restaurant reservations? Perhaps you bought a new negligee you can wait to show the hubby?

And then your kid comes in saying, “I don’t feel good.” And he’s got a 102 F temperature.

Or maybe your boss calls, and you have to come in for an extra shift.

Or you two have an extra stressful day and evening, and when you finally get into bed, the two of you really do want to sleep more than make love at that particular moment.

For my blog and for those moments, my advice is . . . let go and catch up.

Let go of your expectations for that moment. Don’t sweat it. Your sex life is not about this one particular moment, but the accumulation of intimate moments. Of course, the more sexual intimacy you have, the better you’ll feel about your sex life together. But one moment isn’t make or break. Just like me missing the post I had planned isn’t going to crash this blog.

Catch up when you can. I’ll be back next week with that question-and-answer post (preview: on wife’s low sex drive). You can reschedule your physical intimacy too. Take care of the sick kid, work the shift, get a little sleep, and come back together tomorrow. Reschedule. Make it soon, so you’re not putting off until tomorrow what you could be getting on today. But you can catch up a little when needed.

So that’s it. My wisdom for today. Sometimes we need to let go of something right now and catch up as soon as we can.

Of course, if you can get it done, knock yourselves out! And be sure to come back here on Thursday and then next Monday — the days of the week I post.



4 thoughts on “Letting Go & Catching Up”

  1. Totally true. We were in a nice hotel lately while travelling and were planning to put the baby to bed early and have a little fun. But that did not work at all. The little booger refused to sleep in a new bed and stayed up a good two hours longer than usual. By the time she was finally asleep, we were too exhausted to do anything but go to sleep too. So we had to take a rain check. It was a little disappointing, but our relationship can handle it. We didn’t let that totally spoil our trip. Things don’t always work out as planned (especially when you have kids), but you just adjust your plans and find other time to spend together.

  2. Yep. One of my motto’s is: Sex is not an event but the overflow of a great marriage. Life (and blogging) is like that sometimes. We are in the midst of a very busy schedule and in order to not post random bits of junk we are slowing down a little. Thanks for the reminder.


  3. Oh…..this is actually quite timely, praise the Lord. After languishing in mediocrity where our quantity of sex was concerned for…..probably 10 years, my husband and I have recently committed to having a lot more sex–like going from every 10 days to 2 weeks (we had seven kids in 14 years of marriage. We’re just tired.) to making love 3-4 times a week. But we have fallen into “keeping track” now because we don’t trust ourselves yet to stay on course with our commitment. So now it feels scheduled and stresses us out a little if we notice it’s been 2 days. We are still walking the line of going for it whenever we feel like it and making sure it actually gets done without making it feel forced. Thanks for the encouragement.

  4. Absolutely J. Go with the flow of life. Sometimes the best plans come to nothing. You can’t stress about it. Often the most special moments come out of the blue when you least expect it like that afternoon you both get home early by chance or when your parents call to say the kids want to stay over an extra night at Gran and Grandpa’s… 🙂

    Looking forward to next Mondays post.

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