Okay, it’s not actually raining men. Sorry for all of you single women who came over here expecting to throw out your arms and catch a cutie.
However, I will be having some handsome and holy husbands visiting Hot, Holy & Humorous. Next week will begin a series of guest posts from other marriage bloggers with the XY chromosome combination.
I have spent many years trying to understand men. I have studied them like Dian Fossey in the wild with gorillas, figuring out how they think, what they want, and why they spit and adjust things down there so often. As much as I have learned about them, I am not a gorilla man. Whenever I think that I know what men think, I check myself. I do a little research and ask some guys, particularly my beleaguered husband. (Thanks & love you, Honey!) Even though we wives may not ever entirely understand men, it’s a worthwhile endeavor to try.
In fact, it’s important to consider throughout marriage that your spouse does not think exactly like you — and some of that difference is due to gender. We would do well in marriage to try to see things from the other’s perspective. Indeed, I have often wished that my husband and I could switch brains just once during sex so that he could know what I experience and I could know what he experiences. Wouldn’t that be awesome to see things just once through your spouse’s eyes — whether it’s sex or stress or laughter? We would understand their needs and desires so much more.
Now I know that some men will say that their needs and desires are simple: Food and sex. That’s pretty much it. Throw in a hobby (football, hunting, theater, building stuff, etc.), and life is really good.
But I believe that men are a little more complicated than that. For instance, they don’t just want food. Just try serving your guy a tofu and spinach salad, and see what he says. He wants good food. And they don’t just want sex. Just try lying there next time and reading a magazine while he’s at it. Not happening, gals. He wants emotionally-connecting sex.
I will be giving the hubbies a chance to give us a peek into the sexual aspect in the maze of the male brain. I posed this question to several male marriage bloggers:Â What would husbands like wives to know about sexuality in marriage?
I’m happy to say that I have seven men lined up to give us the male point of view (with hopes to add a couple of others). These are men I trust to give it to us straight and share wisdom about God’s plan for marital intimacy. They will be joining us for the next several Mondays.
I hope you’ll come read what these men have to say and that it blesses you in your marriage. So grab your umbrella and your galoshes because the skies will soon be opening. It will be raining men on Hot, Holy & Humorous!
What a fabulous idea! Look forward to reading their insights and points of view.
What a wonderful idea, J! I look forward to the insight from our XY friends! (On a side note, I tap danced in a recital to ‘Raining Men.’ We dressed as Mary Poppins and had umbrellas. 🙂 )
You tap dance? Will you teach me? LOL. I’ve wanted to tap dance ever since I saw Gene Kelly in a movie years and years ago. (Actually, what I wanted was to tap dance WITH Gene Kelly, but *sigh*.)
Mary Poppins and umbrellas… Loving that visual.
I’ll be looking forward to this (and to interviewing my own husband to see if he agrees with your guests!)
Elizabeth@Warrior Wives
http://www.thewarriorwives.com
I am THRILLED to hear this! Can’t wait to read their thoughts and use them as springboards to open up conversations with my wonderful man!
J
I really agree with you on wanting to switch minds with my spouse for a while. I think if everyone had that experience many issues in marriages would be solved.
A Happy Hubby
“I have spent many years trying to understand men. I have studied them like Dian Fossey in the wild with gorillas, figuring out how they think, what they want, and why they spit and adjust things down there so often.”
Some of us guys have never understood the spitting thing either. As for the awkward “adjustments”; this problem was elegantly corrected in God’s creation of human anatomy v2.0 (a.k.a. “Eve”). 🙂
Theater? Really? I’m a guy and I am pretty much over baseball on TV. Why is it everytime they cut to the dugout,a bunch of high-paid jerks have to spit and convince the youth of America that exposing yourself to oral cancer is acceptable. How nasty can that floor be. Nevertheless, looking forward to Mondays here.
I dated a couple of guys in college who were very much into theater, and Stu Gray of Stupendous Marriage is all-male and a theater buff. That’s why I picked that example. Some guys are not sports fans, but they do have hobbies. Anyway…
I love baseball. There is supposed to be a MLB ban on using chewing tobacco in front of fans. But yeah, would not want to clean that floor!
Thanks for coming by! Glad you’ll be joining us on Mondays.
Ugh, why gorillas? Why not Elk? or Eagles? or something that combines grace with power? I’m half joking; I’m not upset with you. Just a couple days ago, a pastor made the comparison that women are like beautiful butterflies and men are bumbling buffaloes. *Then* I was not happy.
Anyway, I adjust things down there so often (but I steal away to do it in private) because things change size throughout the day and need re-situating.
I NEVER spit.
And I’m more than happy to discuss and explain how I think (and maybe even how I feel!!). However, THAT takes closeness and trust. So you’d have to get to know me pretty well first before I confide. =D
We men only *pretend* to be less complex than women. Those ladies who accept that and think they have us figured are missing out. 😉
Love your blog,
Mystery Lurker
Great insight here, Mystery Lurker! I chose gorillas because a lot of people are familiar with the story of Dian Fossey through the Gorillas in the Mist movie AND because gorillas are reasonably close to humans in many ways yet still SO different. I think gorillas are kinda cool actually. Hanging out with them seemed to work for Tarzan. 😉
It’s interesting that you mention closeness and trust before opening up. I’ve noticed a connection between baring your body and baring your soul. Not always, of course. Plenty of people have sex and never really connect. But a relationship of quality married sex invites opening up in other areas too.
Thanks!
That’s a beautiful thing..and I’m looking forward to it….but it would love for the husbands to see and lean about the way a wife or to feel as well!.
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