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Confidence and Beauty with Linda Wilson

Lovemaking Cover from LindaWhen couples are looking for a quality book about Christian sex in marriage, I have a short list I give, and one of the books on that list is Lovemaking: 10 Secrets to Extravagant Intimacy in Marriage by Dan and Linda Wilson. I was happy to give it a high review, because the Wilsons did a wonderful job explaining godly intimacy and giving real-life tips to improve sex in the marriage bed.

But I got a big bonus during that review process: I got to know Linda Wilson much better through our communications. And that contact has blessed me personally many times over. She is an amazing encourager with a heart for missions and marriage. And when she submitted her post linking confidence and beauty, I wanted to cheer. Hope you get as much from it as I did!

Confidence and Beauty with Linda Wilson

I hope you have all been enjoying J’s guest posts about beauty this fall as much as I have. Interestingly, I have noticed that many share the concept that beauty is enhanced by confidence. Yes, yes, yes! Let’s explore this idea a bit further.

Confidence makes you look beautiful and feel sexy. Ooh la la. Picture a woman you admire who walks in confidence. She stands taller, smiles easily, and speaks with assurance. I believe this woman is a Proverbs 31 type, one who “laughs at the future” (Proverbs 31:25). And, as we all know, we can only laugh at the future when we are confident, not ruled by fears or insecurity.

So what gives us this confidence?

Sometimes upon leaving the hair salon ,we can feel beautiful. When we have had the best haircut, some great highlights, the expert styling — all of these combined can make us feel attractive.

Nice mani and pedicures can add confidence. Go ahead and admit it. We all notice other people’s nail color, especially in a room full of women.

And clothing. If clothes make a man, they certainly add to or detract from our feelings of femininity and beauty.

Teeth whitening. Botox. Liposuction. Personal trainers. Diets out the wazoo. The possibilities of things we can do to feel beautiful are endless.  The options available to us in today’s culture are mind-boggling, not to mention ridiculously costly in both time and money.

Hair, nails, clothes — all of these might enhance our feelings of beauty, but they are fleeting fixes. How can we not only feel beautiful, but actually be beautiful? Confident beauty comes by knowing who you are and Whose you are.

Confident beauty comes by knowing who you are and Whose you are. - Linda Wilson Click To Tweet

Synonyms for confidence include poise, assurance, certainty.  These traits come from God who gives them to us with delight. You are beautifully and wonderfully made! You have your Father’s eyes. You see, friends, we are daughters of the King of all kings. That makes us royalty. Regal. Lovely. Powerful. Beautiful.

You are a child of God (1 John 3:1). Ask the Holy Spirit to reveal to you who you really are. You can always believe what God says about you. You are not only a child of God, you are a dearly loved child. You are the object of His affections. Of all the people on earth, He is smitten by one glance of your eyes. You have ravished His heart (Song of Solomon 4:9).

A few years ago I had a dream in which I was seeing sin in my heart. Interestingly, the heart I saw was a physical one as seen in anatomy books. Next a hand came, picked up a paintbrush, and dipped the brush into red paint. With one swipe, the red paint completely covered my heart. His blood completely covered my heart! That is what Jesus sees when He looks at my heart and yours — He sees His blood, not our sin. Lastly I heard Him say to me, “My blood was not wasted.”

Shame or guilt from today or from the past should not haunt us. Our sin is hidden by His sacrifice. We are forgiven. That, girlfriends, should put a spring in our steps, smiles on our faces, and sparkles in our eyes. Nothing is more beautiful than joy! And deep joy comes from confidently knowing that we are forgiven, we are free. Yippee!

“But you (YOU!) are a chosen generation, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, His own special people, that you may proclaim the praises of Him who called you out of darkness into His marvelous light” (1 Peter 2:9). He chose you! That should make you all giddy with excitement. The King chose you. This is not a Cinderella fairytale. Truth is better than fiction! God chose you, and plans on loving you forever. Allow the feelings of love and gratitude to fill you up, spilling out of you onto others. This, friends, makes you truly beautiful.

Occasionally treat yourself to a spa day or purchase a pretty outfit. But remember that true beauty flows from the inside out. It is quite possible that beauty was one of the “things” Jesus had in mind when he said, “But seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things shall be added to you” (Matthew 6:33). Confidently allow others to see Christ in you.

Lovely lady, you are one of a kind. You are spectacularly stunning.  Don’t hide your light under a basket—let it shine (Matthew 5: 15,16).  Laughing at the future, allow the world to know that you are the secure and poised, gorgeous daughter of the true King.

Linda WilsonLinda Wilson is a marriage missionary. She and her darling friend Dan travel around the US and the nations teaching about marriage and sexuality. They also love ministering to widows and orphans.

The Wilsons have co-authored multiple books including 7 Secrets of a Supernatural Marriage and their latest release—Lovemaking. You can discover more about Linda and Dan at SupernaturalMarriage.org.

 

Fine Chocolate Sex: A Review of Lovemaking

I have a favorite line in Lovemaking: 10 Secrets to Extravagant Intimacy in Marriage: “Like M&Ms, good sex can be enjoyable time and time again. But why settle for M&Ms when you can have fine chocolate?”

Given that I’m the kind of person who will dip her greedy hand into a bowl of M&Ms several times over if you just leave it out there, this spoke to my heart. Because at the same time, if you put a single Godiva chocolate on the table beside that M&M bowl, I’d ignore the M&Ms and spend as many minutes as possible nibbling and savoring the delicious fine chocolate instead. Sure, I like M&Ms, but I love fancy chocolate.

And if you want fine chocolate sex in your marriage, read this book.

My rating: ★★★★★

Lovemaking, by Linda and Dan Wilson, celebrates the spiritual and playful side of sex in marriage. Yeah, I admit, that’s my wheelhouse. They are speaking my native tongue! But I think that’s because it’s God’s native tongue as well when it comes to physical intimacy.

We have great freedom in the marriage bed, but also an obligation to satisfy our spouse and honor the gift of sexual intimacy God gave married couples. Dan and Linda take readers through what God has to say on the subject of making love, from flirting and playfulness to physical anatomy to exploring, satisfying, and truly loving your spouse.

This is best read as a book for couples. When I finished my perusal, I immediately thought, “I wish I’d read this with my hubby.” But that doesn’t mean you won’t get plenty out of it to read it on your own.

Now I’ve read so much on sexual intimacy in marriage, I don’t have many Aha! moments anymore. Yet there were some insights in Lovemaking I hadn’t considered!

Plus, it never hurts to be reminded again of what you already know and encouraged to do it.

As you can tell, I liked this book! So I asked Dan and Linda a couple of questions below about Lovemaking and their ministry.

What makes your book, Lovemaking, different or unique?

We celebrate all the new books on holy sex! We are not competing with other authors, but rather we are celebrating what God is doing in this season—He is redeeming sex!

Lovemaking is different as we include Dan’s medical expertise, bringing a clear understanding of anatomy, practical suggestions for maximizing pleasure, and hints for adapting to physical changes due to aging or health issues to the table. This, combined with Linda’s love for storytelling and our passion for holiness in marriage, all work together to make Lovemaking fun, unique, and enlightening.

It did strike me (J) as having a unique tone and something different to offer.

Who is the intended audience?

Of course we want every married couple to read this book! Young couples will learn the value of becoming highly skilled and wholly holy in their lovemaking. Older couples will gain a renewed passion for adding spark and excitement to their play. In fact, just this past week we spoke to a group of Indian pastors about sex. One, a man in his 60s, wrote that after our talk he and his wife were once again enjoying each other like newlyweds. Yippee! Everyone will benefit from Dr. Dan’s enticing prescriptions.

Yep, Dr. Dan’s “enticing prescriptions” are practical tips for any couple to try.

What struck you as humorous or intriguing as you wrote this book together?

Ha! Writing a sex book together has been very stimulating! We like to celebrate sexual standing stones—the memorable, OH MY GOODNESS, stand out from the crowd types of sexual encounters. Let’s just say that writing and thinking about sex much of this last year has enabled us to add several more sexual standing stones to our memory playlist. 🙂

That gets an Amen! from me. I sometimes joke about how my husband and I do “research” for this blog — because that’s just the kind of unselfish, wanting-to-serve people we are. LOL.

Thanks, Linda and Dan, for more details about your book! I truly encourage my readers to check it out. Here’s the quick blurb about the book, followed by a fabulous offer from the Wilsons and Broadstreet Publishing.

Lovemaking: Enjoy Extravagant Intimacy in Your Marriage by Dan and Linda Wilson. Sex is meant to be beautiful, holy, and fun, and every married person can be skilled in the art of lovemaking. Lovemaking will help to: Increase your degree of sexual satisfaction, Understand the purpose and pleasure of godly sexuality, Learn how to give and receive love through sexual expression, Renew passion for your mate, Be equipped to be the world’s greatest lover for your spouse. Great sex is godly. God is the ultimate Lover, and He created us to love. He placed creativity in us to make sex exciting, never dull or routine. You can fully realize the tremendous potential for joy, fulfillment, and purpose in your marriage.

BroadStreet Publishing has given me 20 copies to give away to my subscribers for those willing to tell others about the book. (Soooo generous!) To enter your name in the drawing for one of these beautiful hardcover books:

  • Share the promotional image below on at least one social media platform (Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, Pinterest) with the hashtag #lovemakingbook. (Your tweet, pin, etc. will have its own url (http://____). You can post that in the comment section, and we’ll be able to click over and confirm.)
  • The publisher will randomly choose 20 people who have tagged their social media posts #lovemakingbook and contact you for your address so they can send you the book. (Remember, your email address shows up to me, and I can share it with this publisher, but it will not show up on my blog.)
  • On June 18 (two weeks from today), I’ll post the names of winners on the archive of this post.

Thank you, Wilsons and Broadstreet!