Warning: Don’t ever send me a chain letter, because I’m that person who inevitably breaks the link. I’m terrible at playing tag that way, making sure the relay baton gets to the next person in line.
However, when an interesting blog thread comes along, I don’t mind taking the baton and running my leg of the race. So when I saw posts on what’s wonderful about being married, I decided to throw in with my own list. First, here are the posts I’ve seen so far:
Black and Married with Kids – 4 Awesome Things I Love about Being a Married Man
Generous Husband – 7 Awesome Things I Love about Being a Married Man
Generous Wife – I Love Being Married
Now here’s mine:
1. He does the stuff I’m not good at doing. My hubby takes on some tasks I’m not crazy about and he doesn’t mind so much — like mowing and edging our rather large lawn, killing any roaches that (despite our best repellent efforts) manage to squeeze their disgusting bodies into our home, getting the stuff on the high shelves that would require a step ladder or a pogo stick for me to reach, lifting anything so heavy I’d risk an emergency room visit to attempt it, and teaching our kids how to master sports I happily watch but don’t play. Likewise, I do stuff he’s not good at, and we end up doing more together than we could accomplish alone.
“Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their labor” (Ecclesiastes 4:9).
2. He keeps me emotionally grounded. Not surprisingly, I’m more emotionally expressive than my husband. It’s typical in many marriages, but even more so in mine, given that I’ve fondly called my husband “Spock” here on this blog many times over. (Because he’s sooooo logical.) Having to cooperate with someone who has a different personality can help you work on the weaknesses of your own. His solid anchor personality keeps me from going overboard.
“As iron sharpens iron, so one person sharpens another” (Proverbs 27:17).
3. He models to my kids what it is to be a man. I’ve studied the species of Man all my life, but there’s still a lot I don’t understand. Thankfully, my husband provides the role model of what it’s like to be a man — everything from quality burping to courteously opening doors for women to using physical strength for protection rather than violence. He doesn’t simply show himself as a man, but a godly man. Whenever I list what I love most about my husband, his personal integrity hits my Top 5.
“The godly walk with integrity; blessed are their children who follow them” (Proverbs 20:7, NLT).
4. He is an amazing provider. Day in and day out, my husband goes to work and provides a living for his family. There is genuine security in knowing that my hubby’s got us covered. Moreover, want to know why I am able to devote time to this ministry? It’s because my husband pays the bills. Of course, I’d still want to do whatever I could to support and encourage healthy sexuality in marriage, but it takes time and money (yes, money) to maintain this blog, put out a newsletter, and write a book. I’m sure I could not have done as much as I have without my husband’s financial provision. It’s been a huge benefit of my marriage.
“Anyone who does not provide for their relatives, and especially for their own household, has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever” (1 Timothy 5:8).
5. He’s fun to hang out with. Companionship is among the reasons often given for wanting to marry, and it ranks high on my list too. I enjoy spending time with my husband. We have good conversations, enjoy many of the same things, share affection, and make each other laugh. Indeed, my husband’s word play and dry humor crack me up more than just about anything. Yes, it’s an ongoing struggle to attend to this part of our relationship, when daily demands can easily intrude. But we’ve learned how important it is to prioritize our companionship.
“This is my beloved, this is my friend, daughters of Jerusalem” (Song of Songs 5:16b).
6. He sexually rocks my world. I’m still in awe that I get to sleep next to a totally hot guy — Every. Single. Night. How did that happen?! And on top of that, we make love. Deep, exciting, fulfilling, earth-shaking love. Which leaves me quivering with delight. From getting to look at his beautiful body to feeling his affectionate touches to having amazing physical intimacy, my husband sexually rocks my world. I just love this perk of marriage.
“I belong to my beloved, and his desire is for me” (Song of Songs 7:10).
What do you love about being married? What about your marriage has enhanced your life?
She keeps me from being the person I shouldn’t become but could so easily be.
“I’m still in awe that I get to sleep next to a totally hot guy… From getting to look at his beautiful body…” I am doing a series on female body-image issues (well, trying to at least) and found this comment interesting. I was wondering if you allow your husband to feel and do the same, or dost thou protest too much? So many wives seem to be unwilling to accept that their husbands find their bodies appealing. Please feel free to hold this comment in moderation so it doesn’t skew the desired comments you are looking for. I don’t want to hijack the post but I am curious about how you feel since you are a pro-sex CMBA blogger.
Interesting question, Dan. I should probably write about this specifically. I even checked my answer with my hubby first to make sure he agreed (and he did): My answer is absolutely. I feel like my body is totally mine, but also totally his.
But honestly, it has taken a long time to get to that level of comfort and intimacy. Even though my body probably (…okay, definitely) looked a bit better when I was younger, I wasn’t as open with it then. Now I understand much better that how my husband and I view each other’s beauty is so wrapped up in our whole relationship, and our marriage is now at such a good place (wasn’t always) that we’re mutually generous and appreciative about our bodies with one another. But reiterating, it took a while to get there…both with our marriage and my body image.
J-Thank you for your quick, frank and honest answer. You absolutely should write about it. As a man I am struggling with my approach to it so I don’t sound either self-serving or lurid.
To stray for a moment from political correctness and concern for hyper-sensitivity and be honestly blunt, our wives’ beauty and body types were the first attractors. First we LOOKED. Then we listened. I don’t know of any man who first listened with his eyes closed while he decided whether or not to invest time in establishing a relationship. I feel certain females do the same. First may be how tall is he, but after that it is what does he look like. I make no apologies for acknowledging that truth. Great personality, smart, sense of humor, kind, and blah, blah, blah. Yeah, that too, but that wasn’t first. Owning that truth and dealing with it is the first step in accepting the visual nature of your relationship with your husband, and not just in the bedroom, and working out body image issues. This is good stuff I am now going to put into my post. Thanks for the help in sorting it out. 🙂
Another female marriage blogger and Christian left a comment on my blog much the same. She said as she has aged and matured, most of her body image issues are disappearing but her faith in accepting that she is a unique creation of God and that, as stated in Cor 7:4, her body also belongs to her husband, has brought her the most freedom.
Dan
Wow! What a great post! Th is named me want to work even harder to be a great husband. Maybe someday I’ll be worthy of my wonderful wife. Thanks for posting this. God bless.
Okay, I just wanted to share that I wrote my H a note based purely on #5. He has been beaming for three days! Now I’m going to write a note based on the other items (every couple of weeks). How fabulous to put into words what is so wonderful about my man! Thank you for the inspiration.
ooops! That note was based on #6!
I love it!! I wrote my hubby 6 things using this as a spring board but changing them to fit us. He loved them all and I had fun searching for scriptures for each one. However, #6 was his favorite!! 😉
Thanks for sharing these reasons, J. All of them are true for me also. Related to #2, my husband balances me in areas where I would likely be unbalanced on my own, and I do the same for him. For example, I am prone to excessive worry but he is not, so I have learned from him how much of my worry is pointless.
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