Hot, Holy & Humorous

Where to Have Sex: Part 2

As I mentioned in Where to Have Sex, Part 1, one of the ways to spice up your marital intimacy is by changing up your location. I covered some places you think might be good for sex, but not so much. My readers also added a few places that you should avoid, and the one that gets my vote for the biggest ick is a port-a-john (aka port-a-potty).

Clearly, my post didn’t reach some of you in time, though, as I heard stories of insect bites and other issues post-outdoor coitus. *smile*

Let’s face it: There is a reason why we so often choose our bed as the place to have sex. It is comfortable. There is a flexible mattress, cushy pillows, cool sheets, warm blankets, and plenty of space. However, there are other options besides the bed, an elevator, the beach, the table, and — heaven forbid — a port-a-john. I’m all in favor of varying the location to introduce a little spice into the experience!

Places that May Be Fun for Sex

Outside. Wait! Wasn’t that on my no-no list? Yes, but here’s the thing: The outdoors can be a beautiful setting for lovemaking, and the feel of a breeze on your skin can heighten arousal with your lover. The trick is to pick your outdoor location with care. You do not want to find yourself naked among the ant beds or poison ivy. Head to your backyard (assuming it’s fenced), your porch or deck, or find another private outdoor location. If you have a playground structure or treehouse in your yard, try that. Bring a blanket or quilt and let the moon provide the mood lighting and the birds, crickets, and cicadas provide the music. You could also set up a tent in your yard and camp out together.

A Vehicle. Well, it depends on the vehicle. Those of you who drive a Smart Car should put this one in last week’s “not so much” category. Also if you’re in a classic Corvette, you’ll find the stick shift kind of gets in the way. In the United States, however, vehicles have gotten larger and larger, so if you’re driving a van, an SUV, or a truck, you likely have ample room to get it on in the back seat or truck bed. Find an out of the way location or even your garage, pack a romantic picnic, and turn on your car radio. Turn off the vehicle’s engine and rev up your own engine. Pretty soon, it will be humming and purring with delight. Steaming up the windows and shaking the car are added bonuses to this activity.

A Chair in Your House. A chair is not a bed. But find a cushioned chair nonetheless, not a hardback wooden one. A chair is a great place to vary your intimacy routine because there are sexual positions you can get into with the assistance of a chair that are not easily done on a bed. The wife can sit on her husband’s lap facing forward or straddle him facing the back of the chair. The couple can use the chair for leverage or kneeling. You could also use a bench seat for the same purpose.

(I was tempted to link to a site with some positions, but I admit to being sensitive about such visuals. While tastefully drawn images can help, you don’t need a demonstration; you can explore and figure out what works as a couple. Just use your imagination.)

Water. By water, I mean any place where there is water — your shower, your bath, a hot tub, a river, the ocean, a pool . . . you get the idea. And by sex, I mean the whole kit-and-caboodle, not just intercourse. With those clarifications, I assert that adding a little H20 to the lovemaking can be a scintillating experience. Thus, the shower, pool, etc. is a fabulous place for foreplay, but not for penetration. (It’s too difficult to get into a good position, the surfaces are slippery, and the water can wash away the necessary moisture for comfortable entry.) But go ahead and get naked and explore one another’s bodies. Kiss and fondle. Lick and grope. There is something about the water against your skin that can enliven your senses and make you even more responsive to your spouse’s touch. When you’re ready for more, move the party to a more conducive location for lovemaking.

Pic from Romeo + Juliet

On a cozy rug or blanket. I’m not talking about a scratchy oriental rug that you bought at a garage sale and never cleaned. Or your childhood Holly Hobbie Quilt. I’m talking about a soft fabric placed on the floor — maybe in front of a fireplace or covered with rose petals and lit with candles. Aaaaah, inviting.

In a homemade fort. I’ve seen this idea on a fellow marriage blogger’s site, but for the life of me, I can’t say whose right now. (Step right up and claim credit if it was you.) However, I found a great picture, courtesy of a blog called Hill City Bride.

Homemade fort

Just like you did as a kid, build a sheets-and-blankets fort and decorate it however you want. Make it your love den. Then climb inside and get going. Doesn’t that photo inspire?

A boat. Actually, I don’t know if a boat is a good place to have sex. It’s just on my list of “I’d like to try it.” One reader last time said that they had a good experience on their boat. It seems like you’d need a big enough one to stay steady in the water, but a gentle rocking motion might be nice too.

Little Mermaid boat scene
Was I inspired by Disney?
from The Little Mermaid

And the strangest place my husband and I have ever had sex is . . . Actually, I can’t tell you. If that information came out, it could cause a little embarrassment to the people whose property we were on. I promise we were private and respectful. And it was rollicking fun. We still refer to that time now-and-then with a “Wasn’t that something?” grin and wink.

Okay, it’s time for you to gimme your best spots! If you need to do a little research first, I’ll understand. But share your best places for intimate marital lovemaking below.

39 thoughts on “Where to Have Sex: Part 2”

  1. A very exciting encounter (and our most unique location) was on a sleeper train in the UK. The sounds and rocking motion were enhancing. ‘Boating’ is our to-do list, as well. FUN post, J!

    1. I wondered about a train, but then I wondered how many people would have access to a sleeper train. For some reason, that brings up images of movies from the 1930s-60s with couples on a train. Thanks for sharing.

    2. I just rode an Amtrak train to Chicago a couple of weeks ago. They have sleepers there and it might be worth it to go to a big city (or out to the country) on one for that reason.

  2. On top of a mountain in a tent! We hiked up in the afternoon, ate a light lunch and then climbed in our sleeping bag {note singular} for ‘warmth’. Ha. LOTS of warmth was made! We could be as loud as we wanted to, and for some reason we felt free to try things we had never done before… ahem **69**…. It is most definitely our wildest sexcapade yet 🙂 This post is going to change that though!

    1. Hiking together also probably gave you two some time to talk and bond before even setting up for the lovemaking. It sounds like a wonderful excursion!

  3. Anal sex in the shower is a favorite of me & my wife. The wildest (I would never do it again) on our back porch, I had my wifes skirt up & I know my neighbors had the potential of getting a show. Crazy newlyweds lol. Favorite location was sitting on the couch, or recliner. I’ve heard sitting on a washer while your wife rides you is awesome. Never tried it though.

    1. Well, rather than go into it here, I’ll simply say that anal sex is on my no-no list. (I did a post about it.) But it is possible to have sex in the shower; it is just tricky! Those who want to give it a shot might want to install those tub grippers to keep from falling. That might be a hard injury to explain to the ER physician!

      Maybe I should have suggested turning off the porch light before going outside – LOL. Indeed, the neighbors might get a show if you aren’t careful!

    2. I read your post on no, no’s & disagreed with the anal sex one but to each there own. I turned the porch light off but we had a very bright street light on our driveway in the rear. It wasn’t really a porch either just steps lol. It started in the car & that was to crammed & to the back steps we went. I’d never do it again but glad I have the memory.

    3. Anal is definitely a no-no here after the first time landed me in the hospital with massive amounts of rectal bleeding. Not as bad as a friend though whose hubby thought he was entitled and brought home some other girls nasty infection to her.

      The rectum is not that strong – no matter how much lube you use, and there is just too much bacteria to risk it. Gross, gross, gross. Not to mention that it is the number one sexual act in which HIV is spread. Definitely not willing to risk that.

  4. We live in the country and have a hay field right next to our backyard. I always smile when I see the farmer cutting hay, because that means we will very possibly be making a midnight trek into the hayfield with a couple blankets. Something about the smell of fresh cut hay and the fresh air and all the night sounds…. We’ve even fallen asleep afterwards. 🙂

  5. Anything outside works for me (like when we go camping and it is just a little chilly out). There is something about being outside and in water, though. Coconut oil works great in water, too. It does not get washed away or anything. Just be careful in the tub because it can get slippery in there, but that does make it fun too!

  6. We’ve done the beach, back seat of a car, back yard with a hose misting us, hayfield and….. on top of our carport roof! A tad uncomfortable, but fun memory!

  7. We’ve tried the couch, the kitchen table, the car/truck, camper, outdoors on a blanket, the beach, on our roof with a blanket, in a field, in a truck bed and in the woods.

    Thanks for helping me take a stroll down memory lane!

  8. On top of a running washer is fun. If you sell the washer later though, I would leave that detail out of the sale negotiations.

  9. Can you post on what sexual positions are acceptable in a Christian marriage? I’m planning on doing something special for my husband but I dont know what positions are acceptable besides missonary.

    1. Yes, I can . . . and yes, I will. I believe there is a lot of freedom in this area, but I’ll also be happy to explain what’s reasonable and what’s not. In fact, Julie Sibert of Intimacy in Marriage did a post on positions which I think she titled, “Hey, I’m a housewife, not a gymnast.” Indeed!

  10. Can’t believe guest room sex didn’t make the list. Sure it’s still a bed but so different than your own or that of a hotel. The fact that you are in someone else’s house and they are only feet away makes it very exciting and can even, for some, feel “forbidden”. Of course there is also nothing like a romp when you are the one that has guests. I am sure both of our children were conceived when we had guests. Quite the story to tell I suppose.


  11. Hmmm. Camping with friends. Each couple had their own tent, but that really equaled zero privacy. So, we sneaked to the bathroom late at night, locked the door from the inside and enjoyed each other in the shower. I made sure the coast was clear before my hubby made his exit. He makes a very unconvincing woman.

    1. Camping many years ago. In the same tent as our friends. Talk about having to be quiet!

  12. On the hammock on the covered back deck while it was raining – covered by a blanket, of course.

  13. In the local athletic club’s swimming pool (shallow end of pool) – no one else was around, we also made sure we weren’t in the camera’s view (newly wed at the time, lol).

    We live in the woods pretty much, so we’ve done it outside on a warm sunny evening on a blanket, also on our hammock on the back porch in the dark of night, on the trampoline, in the rain, and a few other places around our property. I’m glad our neighbors can’t see our property! 🙂

  14. we must be boring in this aspect as we have never done it anywhere in the house but the bedroom … unless you count the shower … very rare that happens … but it’s hot when we are traveling and staying in motels with our kids … have to be VERY discrete and QUIET which can be very hard to do … lol …

  15. Car, many other friend’s houses (in the guest room of course), kitchen table, couch, and lots of positions. We’ve done everything short of intercourse in movie theater, backseat of a car with other people in it who had no idea what was going on (that was FUN!), in a park, in car while one of us was driving, and probably more I can’t think of right now. My husband has been talking about doing the full deed outside in the bed of his pickup for years now. I’m thinking I might make that happen soon. 😉

  16. Okay, I have to say that when I read some of these, I smile and chuckle…and then hope you’re not my neighbors. LOL!

  17. In the movie theater bathrooms with the door locked. Forget what the movie was… didn’t forget that evening though!

  18. We’ve had sex at all of those places! Well, except for a boat. Outside is lovely in nice weather…..doggy style is most conducive to that, whilst holding onto a tree or decorative stone wall. Once we used a bench and I sat on his lap. Also….blowjobs are fun outdoors.

    I will not recommend work. We’ve had sex at various workplaces multiple times, and once got caught….the getting caught part was so embarrassing, I still cringe when I see the person.

  19. at a fuel station when we made a refresher stop after a long trip, often stop on the furthest side of the road and have a refill, under the stars with the moon as witness is always great>

  20. guest room sex is good, just make sure you clean up! no one wants to change someone else’s crusty sheets. Having sex when you have guests in your house (we had a party the other week and had friends stay over), and my wife and i went to bed and ended up getting frisky.. it was fun trying to be quiet. not that any of our friends would honestly care :p earlier in the night we ended up in our bedroom to change clothes, and she just closed the door started making out with me for a minute or two like some horny teenager.

  21. My husband and I pack a ‘sex kit’ when we go hiking/backpacking complete with towel to lay on, small towel to clean up, olive oil, sanitary wipes, and an extra baggie for them 🙂

  22. Pingback: 7 Tips for Having Sex at the Parents’ House | Hot, Holy & Humorous

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