Welcome to another monthly roundup of marriage and sex resources with links to recent posts, as well as:
- podcast episodes with Knowing Her Sexually and Sex Chat for Christian Wives
- my monthly post over at KHS Ministry (for husbands)
- any new resources I’m involved in (from online seminars to new site store products)
- resources and products I can recommend for your marriage and sex life
- news and events I need or want to share with y’all
- biblical inspiration for the upcoming month
Scroll through to find what you might have missed or your next great resource for marriage.
This Month on the Blog
Quick note: I’m trying to blog twice a week, but sometimes I only get one blog post out.
- As You Work on Sexual Intimacy, Be Sure to Do This!Improving your sex life isn’t a flip-the-switch proposition. Be sure to do this one thing as you work on the intimacy in your marriage!
- Where Purity Culture Got It Wrong, Let’s Get It RightPurity Culture got some things wrong. Let’s correct the record with biblical truth about God’s design for sex!
- Resource Roundup: March 2021A roundup of marriage and sexual intimacy resources. You’ll definitely find something here you should check out!
- Is Purity Culture to Blame?Have you or sex in marriage been hurt by erroneous messages in Purity Culture or before? Where did we go wrong and what now?
- Kegels Made Easy and Fun!I hated doing Kegels, and when I did them, I was doing them wrong! Enter a new pelvic floor exerciser that I can recommend to other wives.
From Sex Chat for Christian Wives Podcast
- Episode 101: Enjoying Sex, with Joyce Penner
- Episode 102: What You Need to Know About Sex
- Episode 103: Take Time to Titivate
From Knowing Her Sexually Podcast
My Post at KHS Ministry
Click the image below to read.
A Few Great Reads Elsewhere
- I’m in love with my podcast partner Gaye’s Healthy Life Toolbox series. I have felt seen, called out, and encouraged! Here’s a particularly great one: Decide What You Really Deserve – Healthy Life Toolbox, Tool #11 – Calm.Healthy.Sexy. (By the way, Gaye has also pointed out that Dear Wife, You Deserve a Great Sex Life Too).
- Some great thoughts about sexual release vs. sexual relationship in marriage in this guest post from Juli Slattery: Stop Hooking Up In Your Marriage | Shaunti Feldhahn.
- How does the security of your marriage relate to your words? I wrote it about it this past month, but here’s another excellent post on that topic: The Importance of Encouraging Words – Fierce Marriage.
Also, to the WIVES, please help Chris Taylor of Honeycomb & Spice learn more about chronic illness & sex. You can visit her post about it below or just take the survey at: https://tinyurl.com/chronic-survey
Recommended Resources & Products
I’ve often mentioned Christian Friendly Sex Positions as a good resource for positions tastefully drawn yet well displayed and described. But it can be rather unwieldy to lie in bed with your spouse searching through their database. Hey, CFSPs just launched a deck of physical cards with 52 of their most popular positions! It comes in a blank box, so no one but you and your beloved will know what’s inside, and cards include QR codes that you can scan to find the online instructions. (affiliate link)
I wrote a whole post about this product, but I just have to say again: what a smart idea! Ladies, if you want to do Kegels right and in a way that’s actually fun, check out the Perifit pelvic floor exerciser. (And no, this is not a sex toy, but a device for women’s health.)
What J’s Up to These Days
These days, I’m down more than up. Meaning I sleep way more than I used to, but it is what it is. I’m in a season of rest.
- My battle with chronic illness continues, with several doctor appointments lined up and ongoing investigation to answer the question: What is wrong with me? (I mean, beyond my fun craziness. ~wink~) No certain answer yet, but I found an app that helps me track symptoms. In case it helps someone else, the app is Bearable.
- My TBR (to be read) pile is quite large, but sadly it’s been difficult for me to read anything longer than a few pages. I’ve been keeping up with my field through online articles—often read to me with the text-to-speech function—and audio/video content. All of which reminds me that I really need to get my own books into audio!
- Spock and I recently took a short driving date outside Houston to soak up the beauty of Texas wildflowers. Unfortunately, the flowers were in short supply. Some have wondered if Snowmaggedon (our rare snowstorm in mid-February) impacted their growth, but Texas Parks & Wildlife says the flowers should still blossom, though more in April. We hope to take another drive soon and verify that “the sage in bloom is like perfume, deep in the heart of Texas.” (It is.)
Biblical Inspiration for the Coming Month
How do we read the Bible? That is, a lot of us “read” the Bible by seeing and sharing verses or short passages. While time doesn’t always permit, I now try to open up my Bible where the excerpt appears and scan the context. Sometimes, it’s an eye-opener to see the verses that come before or after what was cited.
For instance, we love to share Jeremiah 29:11:
“For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.”
That sounds great, God! Let’s do that.
But if you read the whole chapter, that verse appears in a section telling the Israelites to hang out in Babylonian captivity for a while yet. Wait a minute—I didn’t know CAPTIVITY was part of this deal!
My point is that we want to rest on all of God’s amazing salvation promises, and they are true! He loves us so much and wants the best for us. But sometimes we have to hang out for a while, doing the best we can and finding contentment in an imperfect situation.
If your marriage or sex life isn’t everything you know God wants it to be yet, don’t give up hope. But also don’t demand a miracle from God by tomorrow.
His plan may unfold more slowly, but incremental improvements are often the ones that become permanent and teach us gratitude for both the result and the journey.